The Panthers prove the playoffs are broken. Or they don’t. A debate with myself

I have no idea what to make of the Florida Panthers. Let’s start there, if only to set expectations.

I’m pretty sure they’re the year’s best story – a legitimately great team coming off a Presidents’ Trophy that made big moves to get to an even higher level, took some time to see those changes gel, almost missed the playoffs, and then went on a postseason run that almost nobody saw coming even though we should have. They’re everything that’s great about the Stanley Cup playoffs. This rules.

Unless it doesn’t. Maybe they’re just the latest in a worrying long list of playoff flukes – bad teams that luck their way into a few series wins before inevitably losing in the final. Put them there with the 2021 Habs, the 2017 Predators, the 2010 Flyers, the 2006 Oilers… we see this every few years in the cap era. Hell, a brand-new expansion team made it all the way to the final a few years ago. The NHL playoffs are just random chaos that doesn’t tell us anything at all, and the Panthers are the latest proof. This sucks.

Unless it doesn’t. And around and around I go.

I’m tired of it. So today, I want to figure it out. And like every other annoying internet dweeb, I’m going to get to the bottom of things with two simple words: Debate me. Specifically, I’m going to debate… me.

What can we learn from the Florida Panthers, if anything at all? Let’s see if I can figure this out by arguing with myself.

>> Read the full post at The Athletic

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Puck Soup: The Panthers hired who?

On this week's episode of the Puck Soup podcast:
- We look back at the first three games of the Stanley Cup final
- Jon Cooper wants to change the offside review rule
- The NHL awards show was decent, but more importantly, which voters are we mad at?
- Catching up on the coaching news, including some stunning news that breaks as we're recording
- The Hockey Canada scandal, and what comes next
- Nicklas Backstrom could be done for a while, and I have a suggestion for who the Caps should get to replace him
- Plus ketchup popsicles and other important topics...

>> Stream it now:

>> Or, listen on The Athletic or subscribe on iTunes.

>> Get weekly mailbags and special bonus episodes by supporting Puck Soup on Patreon for $5.

A brutal weekend of COVID-19 news, Paul Maurice resigns and I still can’t figure out the Penguins

Well, this is a mess.

There was hockey played in the NHL this weekend, but not much. Certainly nowhere near as much as we were expecting, back in the hazy and distant past before Omicron completely took over the sports world (i.e. last week).

All told, the NHL had ten games scheduled for Saturday but played only five, then managed just four of eight last night. Outbreaks across the league forced the postponement of everything else, with the virus landing particularly hard on the Flames, Bruins, Canucks, Leafs and Predators among others, and most teams having at least one player on the COVID-19 list. Mix in several cases among staff and other personnel, and it feels like almost every team is waiting for the other shoe to drop on their next game.

We’ve also seen reductions in capacity in several Canadian markets, including an empty arena in Montreal on Thursday. That was a depressing sight, one that we all hoped we wouldn’t see again after last year. The league has also ramped up protocols to something very similar to last season, and postponed all cross-border games until Christmas. The fact that we’re back to all that, along with a steady stream of postponements, feels like we’re heading back to a place we thought we’d left behind.

So now what? It’s not a simple question. You could just shut the whole thing down, and maybe that makes sense with the Christmas break already just a few days away. But beyond that, does a league-wide shutdown of a couple of weeks end up buying you time or just delaying the inevitable? It’s not like Omicron is going to be a two-week problem. And as much as the league will say it wants health to be a top priority, it’s hard to imagine the NHL closing its doors for months unless it feels like it has absolutely no other option. We’re not there yet, and yesterday the league and players announced that the plan for now is to push forward. The way this is going, check back in a few hours.

The good news is that, at least so far, nobody seems to be getting all that sick. That might lead some to push for a different approach: Testing less instead of more, or even allowing asymptomatic players to play through a positive result if they’re able. That sound bizarre and dangerous, but it’s an approach we’ve heard rumblings about in the NFL and NBA, and it might be the only way to get through this without losing a massive chunk of the season. Is it worth the risk?

O’Reilly: “I agree with those guys. We’ve got guys vaccinated and double vaccinated and some guys aren’t showing any symptoms, and they’re getting popped and they’re in COVID protocol. I think I’d like to see no testing unless you have symptoms, but it’s not up to me …

— Jeremy Rutherford (@jprutherford) December 19, 2021

Oh, and the Olympics are supposed to be in six weeks. That’s not much, but in terms of NHL participation, it feels like it might as well be forever. We’re told to expect a decision there in the coming days, and it’s not hard to figure out which direction this is headed — at this point it would be a shock if they still went. Just in case you were looking for more bad news.

By the way, there won’t be any games next weekend. That’s not a doom-and-gloom prediction, thankfully, but a reminder that the holiday break means everyone gets three days off. I’ll still have a rankings column next Monday, but it will be based on less action than usual. Maybe a lot less.

Until then, stay safe and look out for each other. On to this week’s rankings …

>> Read the full post at The Athletic

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Puck Soup: Paul bearers

On this week's episode of the Puck Soup podcast:
- COVID is everywhere - so how long can the NHL keep going like this>
- The Paul Maurice news breaks in the middle of the episode and we read tweets about it to you
- The Canucks are fixed
- The Oilers are not
- Are the eight Eastern playoff teams already set?
- Plus I have to read this week's Manscaped ad and much more...

>> Stream it now:

>> Or, listen on The Athletic or subscribe on iTunes.

>> Get weekly mailbags and special bonus episodes by supporting Puck Soup on Patreon for $5.

Puck Soup: Roasting Sedins

In this week's episode of the Puck Soup podcast:
- The Sedins get their numbers retired, and roasted by Kevin Bieksa
- The scary Jay Bouwmeester situation
- The Penguins finally get their man
- The NHL is trying to pull of an Olympic scam and it will probably work
- Shea Weber, Paul Maurice, Connor McDavid and more...

>> Stream it now:

>> Or, listen on The Athletic or subscribe on iTunes.

>> Get weekly mailbags and special bonus episodes by supporting Puck Soup on Patreon for $5.

Weekend rankings: Who’ll be the next coach to be fired?

We had our first coaching change on the 2019-20 season last week. You may have missed it since it came in Toronto and that team tends to fly under the radar. But with Mike Babcock handed his walking papers and Sheldon Keefe installed behind the Leafs’ bench, we can now settle those “first coach fired” bets from October.

Great. So who’s going to be second?

It’s kind of a macabre question – we’re talking about people losing their jobs, after all – but it’s unavoidable in a league where midseason changes are taking on increased importance. This time last year, we’d already had four, including one by the eventual Cup winners. The Babcock firing came one year and one day after the Blues replaced Mike Yeo with Craig Berube, en route to becoming the fourth team in a decade to fire their coach and win a Cup in the same year.

The Leafs hope they can pull off the same sort of turnaround. But history tells us that they won’t be the only candidate. We’ll probably see another coach sent packing before long. But who is the most likely candidate?

It’s a tricky question, and perceptions can shift quickly. Go back even a few weeks, and the odds-on favorite was clear: Dallas coach Jim Montgomery, whose Cup-worthy roster was spinning its wheels. But the Stars have been on fire lately, so Montgomery suddenly seems as safe as can be. At least until the next losing streak.

A few of his Central division colleagues may not be so lucky. Bruce Boudreau’s Wild continue to flounder, and with an expiring coaching contract and a new GM in place who didn’t hire him, there’s little reason to think he’ll be Bill Guerin’s long-term answer. It feels like more of a when-not-if situation in Minnesota, so the question might be whether somebody else beats them to the punch.

Another Central candidate: the Predators, whose recent losing streak dropped them all the way out of a playoff spot. Adam Vingan explored the question of Peter Laviolette’s job security last week, and the coach doesn’t seem overly worried. But as the league’s third longest-serving coach, and with a veteran roster that’s built to win it all right now, he probably should be.

The only other two coaches with longer tenures may have worries of their own, although Paul Maurice has his Jets hanging around the wildcard race. Jon Cooper and the Lightning have been underwhelming, but he feels like a guy who’d be in danger after another first-round exit, not during the season. Then again, we all said that about Babcock too.

The Pacific offers up a few candidates, with Peter DeBoer’s Sharks and Bill Peters’ Flames both underachieving. San Jose is at least trending in the right direction, and you’d think Peters would get the benefit of the doubt after last year’s turnaround. But six straight losses were starting to feel like a crisis, so somebody getting fired in Calgary no longer feels impossible. The question might be who.

Shifting to the East, the bottom of the standings reveals a few candidates. Jeff Blashill’s been showing up on hot seat lists for a few years now, and while we thought he’d received a vote of confidence last year in the form of an extension, that was under a different GM. Furthermore, the extension reportedly includes a club option, so he isn’t as secure as it looked. The question in Detroit might be whether Steve Yzerman would bother with a midseason change, rather than waiting out a rebuilding year, banking some high lottery odds and then making a change in the offseason.

David Quinn’s Rangers are underachieving in what was supposed to be a transition year back to contention, although he’s only in Year 2. John Tortorella’s Blue Jackets are outside of the playoff picture, although most of us expected that after their offseason exodus. And then there’s John Hynes, who is somehow the fifth longest-serving coach in the league now. His Devils continue to be inconsistent at best, and while he can’t strap on the pads and play goal, you get the sense that patience is running out in New Jersey.

Did we miss anyone? I’m not counting any first-year coaches, on the assumption that nobody’s going to get Sparky Allison’ed. We’ll assume that anyone whose team is overachieving or securely in a playoff spot is safe for now, although two bad weeks can change that. And while his team is playing below expectations, I can’t imagine Gerard Gallant being in any danger, so we won’t call a cab for him anytime soon.

Who’s the favorite? Of all the candidates, Hynes stands out – he’s been around forever, his team looks awful and there’s pressure to win right now thanks to the looming Taylor Hall decision. But Babcock’s availability could shift some equations; we’ve seen teams make surprise moves to grab recently fired coaches before, and Babcock speculation is already popping up around some of the teams on our list. A veteran, win-now team like the Sharks or Predators could make sense if he wanted to jump right back into the mix. And if he doesn’t, a Maple Leafs turnaround after making a switch will just ramp up the pressure on anyone else who seems to be on the fence.

We’re at that time of year. It’s officially no longer early. And as the Blues showed us last year, a big move at the right time can save a season. One team’s already taken the plunge; let’s see who’s next.

Road to the Cup

The five teams that look like they’re headed towards a summer of keg stands and fountain pool parties.

Under Babcock, the Leafs had won just two games over teams currently holding a playoff spot, and neither of those had come in regulation. Under Keefe so far, the Leafs are 2-0-0, with impressive road wins over the Coyotes and Avalanche. Thursday’s win over the Coyotes was a strong 60-minute performance, while Saturday’s victory against the Avs was more of an up-and-down affair. Still, the two wins snap a six-game losing streak, and combined with Keefe’s strategic shifts, they offer some hope that the season can be salvaged, or maybe more than that.

Is that enough for a top-five spot? Well …

5. Toronto Maple Leafs (11-10-4, -3 true goals differential*) – I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Calm down everyone. The Leafs aren’t in the top five based on two games. I’m not that much of a homer, come on.

(But check back next week.)

5. Tampa Bay Lightning (11-7-2, +8 true goals differential*) – They’ve won two straight and five of seven, and looked at least a little like their old selves while rolling over the Ducks on Saturday. They’ve played the fewest games in the entire league, with just 20 on the books, so the point total isn’t impressive. But in terms of points percentage, they’ve already climbed back into an Eastern playoff spot. In fact, they’ve passed by the wildcards and are sitting in third in the Atlantic.

4. St. Louis Blues (14-5-5, +8) – How did you celebrate Mike Yeo Anniversary week? The Blues recognized the occasion with home wins against last year’s top two regular-season teams, as they beat the Lightning and Flames. Then they lost to the Predators on Saturday; they’ll get a rematch tonight.

>> Read the full post at The Athletic

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Puck Soup: First impressions

In this week's episode of the Puck Soup podcast:
- We react to the first few nights of NHL season
- It was a bad week for TV play-by-play guys
- The Maple Leafs name their new captain
- Which coach will be the first to be fired?
- An interview with Mike McKenna
- A "what do these three names have in common" quiz
- And lots more...

>> Stream it now:

>> Or, subscribe on iTunes.

>> Get weekly mailbags and special bonus episodes by supporting Puck Soup on Patreon for $5.

Podcast: Fired coaches, blown offsides, trade deadline best bets + more

In this week's episode of Biscuits, the Vice Sports hockey podcast:
- The axe finally drops on Claude Julien
- Which coach is next to go?
- The NHL blows another offside review
- Franchises that could be on the move
- Dave places his trade deadline bets
- Reader questions
- And lots more...

>> Stream it now on Vice Sports

>> Or, subscribe on iTunes.

---

New book:
THE 100 GREATEST PLAYERS IN NHL HISTORY (AND OTHER STUFF): AN ARBITRARY COLLECTION OF ARBITRARY LISTS

Buy it today: Amazon.com | Amazon.ca | iBooks

The return of the Whiteout

You have to be careful about trusting hockey fans. We’re generally an honest and principled bunch — call it the Canadian influence — but we’ve been conditioned to lie pathologically about certain subjects. My favorite player never dives. (Yes he does, all the time.) Our gimmicky anthem singer is endearing. (No, he’s really not.) Montreal Canadiens ceremonies are always the best. (Only most of them.)

And there’s no bigger hockey lie at this time of year than this one: “the loudest building in the NHL.” That’s because, come playoff time, virtually every building in the league gets that designation from someone, somewhere. It’s become an annual tradition around the hockey world, this daily anointing of some random town as the loudest building in the league, simply because the fans finally bothered to show up and make some noise for a change. There’s nothing quite like sitting in a press box watching tweets scroll by about how noisy it is while thinking, Wait, did I show up at the wrong building? Because it’s not that loud in here.

And so I went into last night’s heavily anticipated Ducks-Jets game in Winnipeg, the first NHL playoff game played in the city in 19 years, fully prepared for noise. I was expecting noise, even hoping for it. But I also came in carrying along a good dose of prove-it-to-me cynicism. And I held on to that cynicism right up until the moment it melted out of my ears and trickled down onto my shoulders, along with what used to be my eustachian tubes and an undetermined number of brain cells. That moment came midway through pregame warm-ups.

Good lord, Jets fans. Maybe ease it up just a bit. Some of us might want to go home and hear our children’s laughter again someday.

This was the sound of one town unleashing almost two decades of pent-up … I’m not even sure what the right word would be. What’s it called when relief and happiness and civic pride become indistinguishable from primal rage? Whatever it is, it was that. A whole lot of that.

And with the noise came the return of one of hockey’s greatest sights: the whiteout. The real one, not the Phoenix version or one of the various other rip-offs out there. We can argue over whether the Jets invented it,¹ but there’s no doubt they’ve perfected it. In the years since the last playoff game in Winnipeg, the concept has been borrowed and repackaged by dozens of teams in various sports, almost always supplemented by free T-shirts left on seats by corporate sponsors, all the better to awkwardly pull over a suit jacket. Not in Winnipeg. They don’t do freebies here. They bring their own white shirts. And pants. And hats, and shoes, and wigs, and face paint, and you name it. I’m pretty sure I saw one guy in a hazmat suit. Leading up to the game, Jets fans’ biggest concern was about whether the team’s white jerseys were white enough.²

And so, 19 years after the original Jets fled to Phoenix, four years after the lowly Atlanta Thrashers moved north to be reborn as Jets 2.0, and two games after the Jets and Ducks kicked off their first-round series, the playoffs had come back to Winnipeg.

Oh, right, the Anaheim Ducks. That’s where this whole feel-good story is going to get a little rough around the edges. The Ducks finished the season with the West’s best record for the second consecutive year.³ With a surprisingly weak Pacific Division fading below them, they feel very much like a Cup-or-bust team, certainly not the kind that would accept losing to a mere wild-card crossover like the Jets.

And through the first two games, the Ducks looked the part. Both times, the Jets held a lead in the third period. Both times, the Ducks roared back to win in regulation. Anaheim came into Monday without having even played its best game but was still just a win away from all but ending the series. It was also the West’s best road team, so if anyone could come into Winnipeg and steal one, it should be the Ducks.

But still, that crowd. Players and coaches had talked about its impact earlier in the day. Ducks coach Bruce Boudreau predicted the fans would be “rabid,” adding, “we hope it’s not too intimidating.” He seemed to be only half-joking. Jets coach Paul Maurice talked about Winnipeg fans coming up to him in the streets to say thank you, and how he felt like a teacher who’d finally helped struggling kids turn their grades around. Winnipeg captain Andrew Ladd said everyone would be excited to see the crowd’s reaction — “It’s going to give us some energy,” he said, before adding, “we’ll see if we use it the right way.”

In the first, there was plenty of energy available to be used. The crowd cheered icings and offsides like most crowds cheer big hits. They cheered big hits like most crowds cheer goals. And they cheered goals, well, they cheered goals like Jets fans cheer goals. Sorry, that’s where the comparison breaks down.

>> Read the full post on Grantland

2011: An NHL year in review

Is it over yet?

This is the time of year when anyone who writes about hockey feels obligated to come up with a year in review piece. But 2011 seems different. After all, is it even worth looking back at a year that was largely marked by tragedy, concussions, franchise instability, and over-the-top violence?

Well, my mother used to tell me that "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all". But my editors currently tell me that "If you don't say anything at all, we don't have to pay you". So apparently we'll be doing a 2011 year in review after all.

Here's a look back at some of the NHL's most memorable moments of the past 12 months.

January 1 - In a request that he will later wish he had worded slightly differently, Gary Bettman prays to the hockey gods that the millions of fans tuning into that night's Winter Classic will get to see Sidney Crosby have one of his best games of the entire year.

January 28 - Phil Kessel is picked last in the all-star draft while Alexander Ovechkin makes a show of taking his photo. Ovechkin later apologizes and promises that he won't take a photo when Kessel is drafted for the 2012 all-star game, since he'll probably just hit pause on his DVR while watching from his living room.

February 28 - In arguably the biggest deal of trade deadline day the Washington Capitals send David Steckel and a draft pick to the Devils in exchange for Jason Arnott, a player so old that he can actually remember a time when trade deadline day was interesting.

Read the rest of this post...

Take the quiz: Should you fire your coach?

"Hey, why does that guy watching practice
with Feaster look like Bob Boughner
wearing a fake mustache and glasses?"

The NHL's coaching ranks were shuffled last week, with three head coaches losing their jobs. That's an unpleasant reality of the business, and ideally we'd all just move on afterwards to focus on some better news.

But the hockey world being the tough place that it is, it didn't take long before all eyes turned to the remaining coaches of teams that aren't meeting expectations. Would there be more teams making changes in the near future? Who might be the next to go? And most important of all, would it be the right call?

Surveys have shown that the majority of DGB readers are active NHL general managers, so I know this is an important topic. So if you're in charge of a struggling NHL team and you're wondering if now is the time to fire your coach, here's a simple quiz that can provide the answer.

After a tough loss a few weeks ago, your coach retreated to the privacy of his office. From outside, you could overhear him:
a.) Angrily smashing furniture at the realization that the team won't go 82-0.
b.) Calmly reassuring his assistants that it's OK to lose the occasional game, as long as it doesn't happen more than once a month.
c.) Excitedly phoning Gary Bettman to ask if this is one of those losses where the league magically give out a bonus point for no real reason.
d.) Wondering why the Anaheim Ducks keep calling his cell phone every time his team loses.

When some were calling for you to make a coaching change earlier in the season, you resisted because:
a.) You have absolute confidence that he's the right man to lead your team to the Stanley Cup.
b.) You think it's only fair to give him until at least mid-season to right the ship.
c.) The coach showed you the section of the rulebook that says that teams from Ohio can't fire anyone mid-season no matter how bad they are, although come to think of it that part was scrawled in the margins and seems to be in his handwriting.
d.) You want to have a frank discussion with the coach in an appropriate setting, and have so far failed to find a suitable barn available for rent.

Read the rest of this post...

A fond farewell to the NHL's fired coaches

"Wait a second," thought Getzlaf, "Why do
I have to be the baldest guy on the bench?"

It's been a bad week for NHL coaches. After a relatively stable first two months of the season, NHL teams apparently decided it was time to start handing out pink slips.

Both Carolina's Paul Maurice and Washington's Bruce Boudreau were fired on Monday, and they were joined on the sidelines a few days later by Anaheim's Randy Carlyle. Or at least Maurice was; Boudreau was busy taking Carlyle's job.

The week's action brings this season's total number of fired coaches to four once you count Davis Payne, who got a head start when he was fired by the Blues three weeks ago. No doubt they'll be joined by others as the season wears on, but for now the latest round of coaching musical chairs seems to have ended.

But before we all move on, let's take one last fond look back and the four coaches who've been shown the door since the season began.

Davis Payne, St. Louis Blues

Previous experience: Was a virtual unknown in the hockey world when he was hired to coach the Blues in 2010, but things are much different these days because it's now 2011.
Career highlight: In one of those crazy little bits of trivia that nobody ever remembers but that's still technically true, was once the head coach of the St. Louis Blues.
Eventual downfall: Like other coaches who've lost their jobs to Ken Hitchcock, just couldn't win back the fans once they'd grown tired of watching vaguely entertaining hockey.
Future outlook: Is apparently working on a long-term deal with Calgary, according to hockey experts overheard mumbling something about Flames fans being in for another decade of constant Payne.

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A brief history of player/coach feuds

"Big silver trophy, about this wide... really, none
of you have any idea what I'm talking about?"

It's getting close to holidays, but Alexander Ovechkin and Bruce Boudreau may have crossed each other off their shopping lists based on an incident that took place earlier this week.

After Boudreau decided to bench him during a crucial shift late in the game, Ovechkin appeared to react to the news by barking some well-chosen obscenities in the coach's direction. While the two later made an effort to seem like they were on the same page, that didn't stop fans and the media from speculating about a rift that could divide one of the league's best teams.

An overreaction? Probably. But whether Ovechkin and Boudreau are feuding or not shouldn't even matter, because this sort of thing actually happens all the time. The NHL has a long history of disagreements between superstar players and their coaches, and many of them were far more serious than a few expletives uttered in the heat of the moment.

Here's a look back at some of the notable star vs. coach feuds in NHL history.

November 18, 2003 - An enraged Scott Stevens accuses Devils' coach Pat Burns of not being a first ballot Hall of Famer, before later apologizing and admitting that could only happen in a world where the selection committee was made up entirely of idiots.

October 26, 2011 - Alain Vigneault's attempt to fire up his best goaltender during a private meeting in his office is ruined by Roberto Luongo constantly knocking on the door and asking "Hey guys, what are you two talking about in there?"

February 4, 1978 - Bruins' defenceman Brad Park finds himself in the doghouse after coach Don Cherry realizes his name is completely impossible to mispronounce.

December 7, 2008 - Team captain Daniel Alfredsson request a one-hour meeting with the head coach to discuss his declining ice-time, but eventually gets tired of having to start over again every fifteen minutes whenever Bryan Murray hires someone new.

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2011-12 Season Preview - Eastern Conference

With the NHL's season opener just days away, it's time for an in-depth season preview of all 30 teams. Today we'll look at the Eastern Conference, with the Western Conference coming up tomorrow. (The Western Conference preview is here.)

Atlantic Division

Philadelphia Flyers: Finally solved their goaltending problem once and for all, in the sense that their problem was that fans weren't sure which goaltender to blame for destroying their salary cap.

Pittsburgh Penguins: Matt Cooke says he understands that his attempt to reform his game will have ups and downs, but still admits he could do without Brendan Shanahan randomly jumping out of the shadows, hitting him in the nose with a rolled up newspaper, and yelling "NO to whatever you were thinking just now."

New York Islanders: Signed John Tavares to a six-year contract that will guarantee he stays in Long Island for another year or two.

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The biggest free agent signings of 2011

Tomas Vokoun, moments after being informed
of the contract terms his agent just agreed to.

We're now twelve days into the NHL's free agency period, and the signings have slowed to a trickle. But while this year's free agent class was widely dismissed as the weakest in years, it did feature a handful of big name players who found new homes during the early frenzy.

Let's take a look back at some of the signings most likely to make an impact in the years to come.

Jaromir Jagr, Philadelphia

The good: Despite repeated requests over the years, wisely insisted on delaying his return to North America until he was absolutely positive his mullet was in game shape.
The bad: Forgotten sports stars attempting improbable comebacks rarely find success in Philadelphia until they've murdered a few dogs first.
Worth noting: Has previously played for the Penguins, Capitals and Rangers, meaning he's apparently aware of the same four NHL teams as Gary Bettman.

Tomas Vokoun, Washington

The good: Was willing to take an enormous discount from his expected contract value because he wanted to play on a team that could make a deep playoff run.
The bad: Due to a clerical error, wound up signing in Washington instead.
Worth noting: Will provide the Capitals with the best goaltending they've had since 1999, which is also presumably the year his agent was born.

Tim Connolly, Toronto

The good: Toronto is a perfect fit for a player with a history of concussions, since the ACC is the closest thing the league has to a permanent quiet room.
The bad: He recently compared the Maple Leafs to the New York Yankees, so he could be distracted by having every Yankee fan he meets from now on trying to punch him.
Worth noting: It may be a bad sign that the last time Brian Burke and Ron Wilson assembled this many Americans on one roster they became the only team in hockey history to lose a big game to Roberto Luongo.

Read the rest of this post...

2009-2010 Season Preview: The Southeast Division

As we count down the final days leading up to the 2009-10 regular season, let's take a look at each of the 30 teams with the official DGB Season Preview. Today, we look at the Southeast Division.

Atlanta Thrashers

The good: The team does, in the strictest technical sense, still exist.
The bad: Their plan to finally make it back to the post-season seems to involve building around former Maple Leafs.
Biggest question mark: How will the team react to the absence of Garnett Exelby, which will force them to play with two defencemen in proper position?
Fearless forecast: A frustrated Ilya Kovalchuk decides to stop passing, hang out at the red line instead of playing defence, and take eight-minute shifts, making him the first player to ever play exactly like you do in NHL 10 "Be A Pro" mode.

Washington Capitals

The good: Alexander Ovechkin seems to finally be coming out of his shell, and may even be willing to participate in occasional off-ice promotional activity.
The bad: I entered "Semyon Varlamov" into a Russian-to-English dictionary, and it came back "Steve Penney".
Biggest question mark: Why does every photograph of Mike Green look like it was taken three seconds after somebody woke him up?
Fearless forecast: The Capitals win 50 games, or more than the Nationals, Wizards and Redskins combined.

Florida Panthers

The good: Recently named Bryan McCabe captain.
The bad: Oops, that last one was supposed to be listed under "the bad". I guess Bryan's not the only one who gets confused about which side things are supposed to go in.
Biggest question mark: With Jay Bouwmeester's departure, which veteran will step up and teach the younger players what it takes to miss the playoffs every single year?
Fearless forecast: A guy who looks oddly like Jim Balsillie starts spending a lot of time in South Florida.

Tampa Bay Lightning

The good: Vincent Lecavlier appears poised for the sort of big year the team had in mind when they signed him to an $80M extension.
The bad: That apparently makes him the only person associated with this franchise who has any actual money.
Biggest question mark: Wouldn't it be better if we all just agreed that the lockout actually started in May of 2004?
Fearless forecast: The Montreal Canadiens make an aggressive deadline push to trade for Martin St. Louis in an attempt to add size.

Carolina Hurricanes

The good: Cam Ward's stellar play continues to indicate that he hasn't yet realized that he's Cam Ward.
The bad: While Ric Flair may be a native South Carolinian, having a crazy old white-haired man scream maniacally is really just an uncreative ripoff of Don Cherry.
Biggest question mark: Does Aaron Ward get one free sucker punch on Scott Walker to use whenever he wants? (Answer: Yes.)
Fearless forecast: The free agent signing of Tom Kostopolous forces coach Paul Maurice to slightly modify his famous quote to "There was a lot of purse stealing out there."

The final four: Who should Leaf fans be cheering for?

For the sixth season in a row, the NHL's final four is taking place without an appearance by the Maple Leafs. That means that the league's largest fan base has nobody to cheer for. And with the second round elimination of the Canucks, there's not even a Canadian team left for Leaf fans to pretend to be cheering for while secretly rooting against.

What's a Leaf fan to do? Yes, OK, but besides watching John Tavares highlight tapes and fondling themselves, what's a Leaf fan to do?

I'm not here to give you the answer, but I do want you to make an informed decision. So here, from a Leaf fan's perspective, are some of the reasons to root for (or against) the four remaining teams.

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Detroit Red Wings

Plus: In this economy, having the Stanley Cup stay in Detroit for another year increases chances that Maple Leafs will eventually be able to buy it in a Windsor pawn shop.

Minus: Their second round victory over the Anaheim Ducks provided disturbing evidence that teams built by Brian Burke can sometimes still lose.

Plus: As the top remaining seed, are the team most likely to win the final round in a sweep. Which, based on the schedule, is the only way these playoffs are ending before July.

Minus: A raucous Stanley Cup celebration could endanger us all by startling Zombie Chris Chelios.

Plus: Occasional news of a Red Wings championship is the only joy left in the life of Bob Probert, as he spends his post-retirement days in the concrete underground bunker he constructed to avoid Wendel Clark.

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Chicago Blackhawks

Plus: Sort of tough to root against the team that gave us Stu Grimson, Dave Manson, and the quivering corpse of Mike Peluso.

Minus: Their upset win over the Canucks brought on the start of Kyle Wellwood's off-season much earlier than expected, possibly leading to summer-long food shortages in Western Canada.

Plus: An appearance in finals might lead to someone mentioning that the Hawks have the longest current NHL championship drought, which would be news to the majority of Canadian hockey fans who assume that the Leafs do.

Minus: If the Hawks win a Cup, a gleeful Toronto media will no doubt produce a flood of stories about the Leafs drought now being the NHL's longest, including one article produced solely by Howard Berger dry-humping his keyboard.

Plus: Are proving that a team can win despite overpaid and sub-par goaltending, which might help create an off-season market for Vesa Toskala.

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Pittsburgh Penguins

Plus: Offer hope to Leafs fans by proving that a decade of constant losing, front office incompetence, and almost total irrelevance can result in a pretty darn good roster.

Minus: Every game they win means a few more days of having to look at Sidney Crosby's child molester moustache playoff beard.

Plus: Jordan Staal's showdown with brother Eric will inevitably result in TSN doing a "top ten hockey brothers of all-time" countdown, and it will be nice to see Luke and Brayden Schenn in the #1 spot.

Minus: Not really fair for them to win this year's Stanley Cup, since they're already pencilled in to win the next five or six.

Plus: Feature an inspiring feel-good story in form of defenceman Hal Gill, the only player ever signed by John Ferguson Jr. who is still playing in the NHL.

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Carolina Hurricanes:

Plus: Each win results in more momentum for the idea of Cam Ward starting for the Canadian Olympic team in place of Roberto Luongo, which is great news assuming you're among the 99.5% of the world's population that isn't from Canada.

Minus: Sometimes, their runs to the Cup final result in Leafs getting stuck with their loser coach.

Plus: If they win, Leaf fans won't have to put up with annoying trash-talk from die-hard Hurricanes fans, since there aren't any.

Minus: Yet another Cup ring for Frantisek Kaberle might make brother Tomas start to have second thoughts about this whole "have zero interest in ever playing for a winning team" policy.

Plus: A championship run would help with publicity for Scott Walker's admirable new charity, "Beat Cervical Cancer by Sucker Punching it in the Face".

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The bottom line: I think when you weigh the evidence, the final verdict is pretty clear. Leafs Nation, we can all agree on this, right?

Yeah, I thought so. Pass the Tavares highlights.

Lie to me

The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you've got it made. --Jean Giraudoux

Say what you will about Ron Wilson and Brian Burke, but we know one thing: they're honest.

If they like you, they'll say so. If not, they'll say that too. And for the most part, that's been a breath of fresh air for Leaf Nation.

The John Ferguson/Paul Maurice era was marked by a relentlessly cynical optimism. Ferguson always liked the team, no matter how bad they looked on paper. Maurice famously thought they were going to make the playoffs and compete for a Cup. And the players always claimed they were just one bad bounce away from being really good.

Burke and Wilson came in started to tell it like it is. I loved it.

But here's the thing about honesty. It's not always the ...

Crap, wait a second, I just remember my wife reads this blog sometimes, and she won't like what I'm about to say. Um, hold on.

Hi honey! Say, have you seen the highlights from the Puppy Bowl? Weren't those little guys adorable? They were so just so scrappy!

OK, now that she's gone, let me get back to my point.

Here's the thing about honesty: it's not always the best policy. Sometimes, telling the truth just for the sake of it is dumb. And Ron Wilson and Brian Burke have been treading into that territory in recent weeks.

First, a little history. From the very start, Ron Wilson has refused to sugarcoat the quality of the roster. He told us in September that the team wouldn't be very good, and he's been proven right. When guys like Matt Stajan, Jason Blake and Tomas Kaberle weren't playing at the level they needed to, Wilson didn't worry about protecting anyone's feelings. He made each guy accountable, the way a good coach should (and bad coaches don't).

When Brian Burke joined the fold, he kept the honesty flowing. He didn't try to shine up a turd.

All that honesty created an atmosphere of accountability for a team that had been missing it for years. Suddenly, a locker room that had become used to being treated with kid gloves had to deal with a stiff dose of reality. Not everyone responded, but most did. And a willingless to tell the cold hard truth meant that when a player did hear praise, they knew they'd earned it.

As recently as a few weeks ago, Wilson and Burke called out goalie Vesa Toskala for his poor practice habits. Good. Toskala's a veteran and he's paid to play at a high level. If he's not committed to doing so, he should hear about.

But recently, Wilson and Burke have gone too far. And now, they may be hurting the team.

First, there was Burke's bizarre announcement that he wasn't interested in resigning Nik Antropov. While there's no doubt Burke meant what he said, his honesty probably didn't accomplish anything beyond lowering Antropov's trade value.

Next up was Dominic Moore. A few days ago, Wilson said that fans were getting "carried away" with Moore's production, and pointed out that he wouldn't be good enough to have the same sort of offensive numbers on a better team. "Scoring points on a really bad team, that's really all it is," Wilson said.

Was Wilson wrong? Probably not. But why dismiss Moore's accomplishments right before the trade deadline? And beyond that, Moore is a long-time fourth-liner who's about to taste unrestricted free agency after a career year -- what kind of coach publicly cuts a guy down under those circumstances?

Then came today's comments from Burke about rookie goalie Justin Pogge. "He has not earned the right to be here," Burke said, going on to explain that Pogge was getting NHL starts primarily to try to motivate Toskala even though the kid didn't really belong in the big leagues.

Again, brutally honest and probably 100% correct. But Pogge is a borderline prospect having an underwhelming AHL season, forced to audition for an NHL role behind a terrible defensive team. He'd hardly be human if his confidence wasn't already shakey. What possible good can come from hearing his GM cut him down to size on the radio?

For the life of me, I can't figure out what these two are thinking with some of the recent comments. So I'll take a cue from Wilson and Burke and try a little honesty myself: They sound like two guys who have suddenly become a little too interested in the sound of their own voices, and have forgotten that they're here to win.

Winning over the media folks who love a good sound bite doesn't go very far towards building a contending team. But a little bit of well-placed B.S. just might.

Lie to me, guys. Or at least play the part of the good husband, and learn when to change the subject.

2008: A Maple Leafs year in review

Jan. 22 - John Ferguson Jr. is fired. After being informed of the decision, Ferguson nods quietly, adjust his suit, offers a firm handshake to everyone in the room, and then spends the next 45 minutes pulling on the exit door marked "Push".

Jan. 23 - Waking up to the news that Cliff Fletcher has been named interim GM, Toronto sports fans joke that who's next, Cito Gaston and Don Matthews?

Feb. 5 - The Leafs lose 8-0 to the Panthers at home. "If it had got to 9-0," says coach Paul Maurice, "I was thinking about actually raising my voice at somebody."

Feb. 24 - Mats Sundin announces that he will not waive his no-trade clause, telling the media that "I have never believed in the concept of a rental player. It is my belief that winning the Stanley Cup is the greatest thing you can achieve in hockey but for me, in order to appreciate it you have to have been part of the entire journey and that means October through June".

Although nobody gives it much thought at the time, in hindsight it was probably noteworthy that Sundin read the entire statement in a sarcastic Homer Simpson voice.

Feb. 26 - Trade deadline day. While Fletcher can't manage to deal any of the "Muskoka Five", he does manage to make a pair of deals with Florida. In one deal that turns out to be a steal for the Leafs, he manages to get a draft pick from the Panthers in exchange for a player who'll likely never record another point in the NHL. He also trades them Chad Kilger.

March 17 - Vesa Toskala lets in a 180-foot goal against the Islanders, marking the only time this year that he managed to handle a long shot without kicking out a huge rebound.

April 3 - In an otherwise meaningless late-season game, Mark Bell destroys Daniel Alfredsson with an open ice hit. While nobody likes to see a grown man writhing on the ground in agony, the Ottawa Sun's Bruce Garrioch does eventually regain his composure and return to his seat.

April 23 - Brian Burke announces that he will stay on as GM in Anaheim through the remaineder of his contract. Mats Sundin comments "Well, he wouldn't be saying it if it wasn't true."

May 7 - Paul Maurice is fired. Upon hearing the news, Maurice retreats to his office and packs up his belongings: some family photos, a few old files, and 164 unused timeouts.

June 10 - Ron Wilson is hired as the Leafs new coach. He promises that his team will work hard, be defensively responsible and forecheck relentlessly. In related news, Jason Blake posts his resume on monster.com.

June 19 - Fletcher raises a few eyebrows when he trades a third round draft pick for Jamal Mayers. Fletcher explains the deal by saying "We have a team of guys who are a little bit on the small side and can sometimes be intimidated, and we need somebody to protect them from no-talent thugs who might try to hurt them. Mainly Ryan Hollweg in practice."

June 20 - Cliff Fletcher trades up to select Luke Schenn with the fifth overall pick of the NHL draft. Fletcher says he was impressed by Schenn's maturity, his defensive presence, and the enormous star that lit the entire sky the night he was born.

June 25 - The Leafs buy out Darcy Tucker. Fighting through tears, a devastated Tucker says "Well, look on the bright side, at least I never have to play with Andrew Raycroft again."

June 27 - The Leafs waive Raycroft and Kyle Wellwood, two players who both fell out of favor due to their frequent association with the phrase "top shelf where momma keeps the peanut butter".

July 1 - The Leafs surprise many on the first day of unrestricted free agency by signing Jeff Finger to a $14M contract. While many experts feel the Leafs have overpaid, the signing receives unanimous approval from the nation's pun headline writers.

Aug. 14 - Bryan McCabe reportedly agrees to waive his no-trade clause, on the strict condition that he be dealt to one of the 28 or 29 very best teams in the league.

Sept. 19 - The Leafs open training camp. Ron Wilson is asked whether he thinks the Leafs can compete with teams like the Senators, or whether they will be embarrassingly pathetic, and replies "yes".

Sept. 25 - Leafs co-owner Larry Tanenbaum causes a minor controversy when he gives an obviously wrong answer to a hypothetical question about winning the Stanley Cup. The hypothetical question is "What's the first thing you should do to win a Cup", and Tanenbaum fails to correctly answer "Resign".

Oct. 2 - Ian White shakes hands with Wendel Clark at an off-ice function. The next day, a confused White wakes up sporting a full moustache. Attempts to shave it off result in his razor blade starting to bleed.

Oct. 17 - The Canucks waive Kyle Wellwood, who goes unclaimed. "Let's face it," says Canucks GM Mike Gillis, "We're not going to get anywhere building this team around out-of-shape former Leaf centers."

Oct. 23 - In a highlight reel hit, the Bruins' Milan Lucic drives Mike Van Ryn through the glass. Van Ryn later says "When I first heard the sound of glass shattering, I just assumed somebody had lightly nudged Carlo Colaiacovo."

Nov. 22 - The Leafs honor Wendel Clark. After a video tribute and an emotional speech, the Leafs unveil a banner which Clark promptly uppercuts into the rafters.

Nov. 24 - The Leafs trade Colaiacovo and Alex Steen for Lee Stempniak. Fletcher explains "Any time you can trade two guys who usually do nothing for one guy who always does nothing, you have to make that deal."

Nov 28 - On Brian Burke's first day on the job as the Leafs' new GM, Richard Peddie peeks his head in the door to ask if there's anything he can help with. Burke calmly pulls a .357 Magnum from the top drawer of his desk, shoots Peddie in the chest without looking up, and then says "no, but thanks for asking".

Dec. 4 - While looking in the mirror, Ian White realizes that each hair in his moustache has begun growing its own moustache

Dec. 22 - Justin Pogge makes his debut and looks good in a 6-2 win. Curtis Joseph and Vesa Toskala try to figure out why every time the other team takes a shot, the ensuing faceoff is in the offensive zone instead of center ice.

Dec. 25 - Luke Schenn gets the same Christmas gifts he gets every year: gold, frankincense and myrrh.

Dec. 30 - Curtis Joseph records his first win of the season. While he appreciates the Leafs recognizing his career milestone with a scoreboard message, he wishes they had chosen better wording than "Curtis, congratulations on your 450th (and final) career win!"

Jan. 1, 2009 - Ian White's moustache begins to learn at a geometric rate. It becomes self-aware at 2:14 a.m. Eastern time.

Five games in...

Some quick hits as we round past the 1/16th mark...

• Please stop talking about Luke Schenn's contract situation. It doesn't matter. The decision to keep him in Toronto or send him back to junior has nothing to do with starting the clock on his free agency eligibility.
  
  First of all, it's crazy to make assumptions about what the CBA will be like three or four years from now, let alone seven or eight. We have no idea when Schenn will be a free agent, because we have no idea how the CBA will read in a few years. And for that matter, it doesn't even matter whether Schenn is helping the team. The season is already a writeoff, so who cares if Schenn can add a few wins?
  
  The only factor worth considering is Schenn's development. That's it. Will he develop better in junior than in Toronto? If so, send him there. If not, keep him around. End of story.
  
  If he hits free agency a year early and demands big dollars because he's playing at a superstar level, that will be a problem the Leafs will be happy to have.
  
  
• I want to like Mikhail Grabovski. The kid has some moves, he's fast, and I'd love to chalk up the zero points to bad luck. I want him to a be star. But... um... I'm not getting that vibe yet, you know?
  
  
• Do Jamal Mayers and Ryan Hollweg have some sort of secret sidebet to see which one of them can be the first to get one of their teammates killed?
  
  
• I love the way Ron Wilson is handing out playing time. He's basically throwing his lineup card onto the ice every night and saying "Here, you guys fill this out".
  
  Last night in Pittsburgh, Wilson gave virtually the entire team a shot at powerplay time. That's exactly what he should be doing this early in the season. While Paul Maurice basically handed out ice time based on salary and reputation, Wilson is letting guys play their way in -- or out. Perfect.
  
  
• That said, maybe it would be a good idea for Wilson to ask Cliff Fletcher for a list of guys he's trying to trade and not bench them. Mike Van Ryn, I'm looking in your direction.
  
  
• Nikolai Kulemin is good. Two unassisted breakaway goals and two shootout goals -- if anybody ever figures out how to pass the puck to this kid, look out.
  
  
• Speaking of people who are really good at breakaways, only the exact opposite, why was Matt Stajan taking a shootout on Friday? Did I fall asleep and miss the first 14 rounds of that one?
  
  
• Finally... Dominic Moore is playing so well that I'm going to give him a new nickname: Dominic "Second Round Pick at the 2009 Deadline" Moore.