It’s almost 24 hours later, and hockey fans around the league are still talking about The Video.
You know the one. Late Monday night, the Ottawa Senators unveiled a video featuring owner Eugene Melnyk being interviewed by defenceman Mark Borowiecki. It was meant as an opportunity for Melnyk to finally lay out a long-term vision for the team’s future. But not everyone was impressed, partly due to Melnyk’s message and partly because the video struck many as, in the words of colleague James Gordon, “deeply weird”.
One element that’s come in for some criticism is the choice to have Borowiecki handle the interview duties. But while it may surprise some of the team’s more cynical fans, the Senators actually put a lot of thought into that decision. In fact, we’ve been told that the club even held auditions to make sure they nailed the best choice possible for the role. And as luck would have, DGB spies were there to record the top-secret transcript.
Director: And… CUT!
Mark Borowiecki: Whew. Was that OK?
Director: That was great, Mark. You did fantastic. But Eugene and I were talking, and we’d like to bring in a few other folks from around the hockey world to audition for the interviewer’s role.
Eugene Melnyk: Yeah, we’re just not sure that having an actual Senator do the interview is going to look good. Might seem a little softball-y, you know?
Borowiecki: Sure, I guess that makes sense.
Director: Thanks for understanding. Feel free to stick around while we run through a few more auditions. OK, first up is, let’s see … Henrik Zetterberg.
Zetterberg: Hi everyone.
Melnyk: Wow, thanks for coming out Henrik.
Zetterberg: Hey, my pleasure. I always wanted to try out this whole interviewing thing. Gives me something to do in retirement, you know.
Melnyk: You’re retired?
Zetterberg: Uh…
[Ken Holland appears in the window, making a throat-slash gesture.]
Zetterberg: Something to do while I’m injured. You know, as I work my way back from injury so that I can resume my playing duties under my contract without triggering any cap penalties. Which is totally what I’m doing.
[Holland does the eye-point move.]
Zetterberg [under his breath]: Yzerman’s totally replacing you.
Melnyk: What was that?
Zetterberg: Nothing. You know what, this may have been a bad idea.
Marc Bergevin: Did I hear somebody say “bad idea”?
I realized something a few months ago that simultaneously made me feel very old and also kind of proud: I’m now into my second decade of sportswriting.
That’s not all that much in the grand scheme of things, and you don’t get a trophy or collectible pin for it, but it’s still kind of neat. And it feels like the sort of milestone that goes well with a major career change. Today, I can share that I’ve reached that point, too. Earlier this summer, I agreed to join The Athletic on a full-time basis.
And now, I’m writing a post about it, because they are making me do that.
It’s kind of a thing around here.
I’m guessing you know the drill. Computer scientists estimate that the internet produces roughly 1,200 petabytes of data per month, and at this point, I think roughly half of that is sportswriters explaining why they’ve joined The Athletic. By now, you’re familiar with the basics – the industry is going through a tough time, new business models are needed, and it no longer feels unreasonable to ask readers to pay for a product that has value, just like they do in almost every other type of business. Not having to fight through ads or auto-playing videos to get to the content is a nice bonus.
All of that is true. I’m just not sure how much I can add to it. But I’ve always believed in a “when in Rome” type of philosophy. When you move to a new neighborhood, you learn the local customs. When you’re in a stadium and everyone else starts doing the wave, you roll your eyes and join in. When you’re traded to the Senators, you immediately demand a trade away from the Senators. And when you join The Athletic, you write a post about why you’re joining The Athletic.
So that’s what I’m doing.
But how? What’s the angle? How do you make something like this feel fresh? I briefly considered posting an adorable childhood photo of myself sleeping under The Athletic bed sheets, but apparently, somebody else already beat me to that idea. So instead, I’m going to stick with the story of how I got here. Because it’s not one that many of my peers can tell.
The trade deadline is less than two weeks away, and most of the speculation has the Maple Leafs being relatively quiet. They’ll probably make a depth move or two, and could deal a pending UFA, but anything bigger than that would come as a surprise.
That’s likely the right move for the franchise, even if it would no doubt draw criticism from some fans who want to see the team swing for the fences. Trade deadlines are always more fun when your team goes big.
Then again, big deals aren’t always the best deals, and Leaf fans know that well. The team has had, to put it generously, a mixed history when it comes to the trade deadline. Today, let’s revisit that history with a quick ranking of every Leafs trade deadline of the last 25 seasons.
We’ll define “the deadline” as the two weeks leading up to the last day of trading, and our 25-season cutoff will take us back to 1991. Why then? Because 25 is a workable number, it essentially covers the time where the NHL’s trade deadline was a big deal, and it happens to coincide with the start of the Cliff Fletcher era. Also, it avoids having to mention the Harold Ballard era, as per my therapist’s recommendations.
We’ll rank our way down from worst to best. And we’ll start with one of the low points in recent franchise history.
25. – 2008
The deals: On the verge of missing the playoffs for a then franchise-record third straight year, the Leafs fire John Ferguson Jr. and head to the deadline firmly in fire-sale mode. Interim general manager Cliff Fletcher moves Wade Belak, Chad Kilger and Hal Gill, all for picks.
The outcome: None of the picks end up helping the Leafs, but that’s not the reason this year rates dead last on our list. No, that has more to do with who wasn’t traded – namely, the fabled Muskoka Five, the group of veterans led by Mats Sundin who decide en masse not to waive their no-trade clauses.
Fletcher is clearly furious, but his hands are tied. A golden opportunity to rebuild slips away – Tomas Kaberle would have landed the Leafs a young Jeff Carter – and the team doesn’t fully recover for years.
24. – 1997
The deals: With the Leafs on the verge of missing the playoffs for the first time in five years, Fletcher goes into sell mode. He’d already moved Doug Gilmour to the Devils a month earlier. On deadline day he sends Kirk Muller to the Panthers for prospect Jason Podollan, and Larry Murphy to the Red Wings for future considerations.
The outcome: Podollan never amounts to anything. But it’s the Murphy deal that stands out. The future considerations end up being nothing at all – Fletcher literally hands a future Hall-of-Famer over to the Red Wings as a freebie. Murphy puts in four good years in Detroit, helping them win two Cups, and the move stands as one of the most lopsided trade deadline deals in league history.
23. – 2003
The deals: In what turns out to be his last year as general manager, Pat Quinn goes all-in. He makes the Owen Nolan blockbuster, and trades draft picks for veterans Glen Wesley, Phil Housley and a returning Doug Gilmour.
The outcome: You can appreciate the effort, but in hindsight none of the moves work. Nolan gets hurt and later has a falling out with the franchise, and acquiring him costs the Leafs a first-round pick in the ridiculously stacked 2003 draft. Wesley and Housley don’t add much. And the worst of the bunch is Gilmour; his big return lasts just five shifts before his career ends on this play:
22. – 2001
The deals: In their only deadline deal, the contending Leafs trade Adam Mair and a second-round pick to the Kings for Aki Berg.
The outcome: Berg struggles badly and quickly becomes a whipping boy in Toronto. The deal somehow gets even worse when the Kings turn the second-round pick into Mike Cammalleri.
21. – 1996
The deals: With Pat Burns fired and the Leafs fading, Fletcher starts blowing things up by sending Ken Baumgartner to the Ducks and Dave Andreychuk to the Devils. But the big news is the blockbuster that brings Wendel Clark back to Toronto.
The outcome: The Clark trade ends up being widely viewed as a disaster; the Leafs give up a young Kenny Jonsson and a 1997 draft pick that turns into Roberto Luongo. It’s the deal that leads to Fletcher’s infamous “draft schmaft” comment and puts the first serious dent in his Toronto reputation. Still, if you were a Leafs fan back then, you can’t deny that Clark’s return to the Gardens was one of the decade’s best moments.
20. – 2013
The deals: In the first year of the Dave Nonis era, the Leafs only make one move, adding Ryan O’Byrne for a pick.
The outcome: You would have thought the playoff-bound Leafs would be trading for multiple assets, but as it turns out, it was for one.
The Maple Leafs are on track to make a run at the playoffs, at least a year ahead of their rebuild’s expected schedule. They boast three of the league’s top rookies, and Auston Matthews in particular is already drawing comparisons to some of the game’s greatest franchise players. The team plays exciting, high-scoring hockey. And the underlying numbers suggest that they may be even better than their record indicates.
All of this in a year that didn’t carry much in the way of expectations. This was supposed to be the fun season, and it’s been more fun than just about anyone could have imagined. For the first time in at least a decade, there’s a real air of excitement and optimism around the Maple Leafs.
Well, screw that.
I mean, the season has been great, but we’re still Leaf fans, right? We haven’t completely lost out ability to see the glass as half empty — and also cracked and leaking and full of poison.
So today, let’s look at some of the ways this dream season could go off the rails in the second half, and how likely they are to come to pass. Consider it a chance to exercise those pessimism muscles, if only to keep our karma levels in check.
Frederik Andersen goes cold
We all remember Andersen’s first month in Toronto, where he struggled badly and had everyone wondering if the Leafs had swung and missed on their biggest offseason trade. That turned out to be a false alarm, and Andersen settled in and played well for the next two months.
But Andersen hasn’t been all that good lately, posting a .902 save percentage in January. And it’s worth remembering that with just 166 NHL games under his belt, we’re still not exactly sure what he is. Mike Babcock hasn’t had much faith in his backups all year, and Andersen is going to blow by his career-high of 54 starts. If he falters down the stretch, he could take the Leafs’ playoff hopes with him.
How scared should you be?: Moderately. The Leafs would be in trouble if their starter struggled, but you could say that for most teams. Andersen’s October taught us not to overreact to a few bad games. Then again, it also reminded us that sometimes even a good goalie can have an awful month, and another one from Andersen would torpedo the Leafs.
Someone gets hurt
The Leafs have been remarkably lucky with injuries so far; not counting the long-term cases like Joffrey Lupul and Nathan Horton, they’d been healthy almost all year until Morgan Rielly went down.
The good news is that this Leafs team isn’t one that’s built around one or two key players who you absolutely couldn’t afford to lose, at least not yet. Losing Andersen would be massive, but again, you could say that for almost every team. An injury to Matthews would be a big deal, but there’s enough forward depth on the team and in the system that the Leafs might survive. If anything, the team’s performance during Rielly’s absence has shown that he may be the most important of the bunch.
How scared should you be?: Injuries happen to every team, and they’ll probably happen to the Leafs before the end of the season. It’s going to be a question of who, and how long.
If you spend much time reading about sports online, you’ve no doubt encountered The Players’ Tribune, a website that features articles written by athletes. That unique hook, paired with a smart social media strategy, means that the site’s content tends to be unavoidable.
That’s never more true that when the site produces its signature piece: the “Letter To My Younger Self”, in which an athlete sits down to pen some words of wisdom to themselves from days gone by. It’s a fascinating feature that gives us valuable insight into the lives of professional athletes, such as the fact that they all write in exactly the same voice. Even Brendan Shanahan did one.
Apparently, he’s not alone. Top secret sources inform me that Maple Leafs rookie Auston Matthews has been asked to contribute a letter of his own for an upcoming edition. And as luck would have it, DGB spies were able to get their hands on the first draft…
***
Dear younger Auston,
Man, it seems like it was only a year ago that you were just a wide-eyed kid, sitting around dreaming about going first overall in the entry draft and wondering where your NHL journey would begin.
That’s because it was only a year ago. Look, don’t be a wiseass. This is why nobody likes teenagers.
Anyway, the point is that I’m your older and wiser self, and I’m here to give you some good news. It all works out pretty well.
It turns out you do go first overall at the draft, just like you’d always hoped. And that means you end up playing for the team that wins the lottery: The Toronto Maple Leafs. I know that comes as a surprise because you assumed that the whole thing was rigged so that only the Edmonton Oilers ever won, since that’s what Connor McDavid told you that one time you met him and he shook your hand while blinking “help me” in morse code.
But nope… you’re going to be a Maple Leaf.
That means you get to move to Toronto, which is a cool place. As best you can tell, the city’s baseball, basketball and soccer teams have always been really good, so there’s a lot of pressure on you to help the Maple Leafs get there too. But the whole town is really behind you. Everyone offers advice, from the cab drivers to the waiters to the hot dog vendors. Well, one hot dog vendor in particular. He keeps trying to hand you a note that he says is from “a friend” and which just has the word “RUN!” finger-painted in mustard. Still, I think that counts as being helpful.
Monday is an important anniversary in the evolution of this Maple Leafs team, although we shouldn’t expect any press releases or pregame ceremonies. Instead, the team will let the date quietly slip by, without mentioning that it marks four years since Brian Burke’s reign as general manager came to an end.
Burke’s firing, announced shortly after the end of the 2012-13 lockout, came as a surprise. It’s rare to see a GM stay on the job throughout an offseason, only to be dismissed days before opening night. It eventually became clear that Burke’s relationship (or lack thereof) with new ownership had been the factor that sealed his fate.
Burke’s Toronto tenure was picked apart in the days after the firing, and in the years since. No doubt they will be again in the days to come. In short, Burke was a failure as Leafs’ GM. He drafted poorly. He mismanaged the cap, especially when it came to free agency. He refused to take advantage of various CBA loopholes that seemed tailor-made for big-money teams like Toronto. And he consistently misjudged his own roster, always believing he was almost there, as if we’d all wake up one morning and realize that what looked like a last place team was actually a contender.
So yes, Burke deserved the criticism, just as he deserved to be fired. All of that was fair. All of it was true.
But all of that also makes it easy to forget one other key trait of the Brian Burke years: When it came to trading, the man was freaking brilliant.
Not “good” or “above average”. He was ridiculous. During his time in Toronto, he put together one of the best trading records in the entire league.
That mattered. And it’s worth remembering today, as the league plods through an era where few teams use trades to build their roster, including the current iteration of the Leafs. While it’s still relatively early in the Lou Lamoriello era, the team has only made three deals of any real significance – Phil Kessel to Pittsburgh, Dion Phaneuf to Ottawa and Frederik Andersen from Anaheim.
That’s not a lot, but it’s three more than some teams have made. That’s the way it works in today’s NHL, where trading is a dying art. It’s too hard, we’re told. The salary cap is too complicated, we’re reminded. You just can’t make trades anymore, whines a generation of risk-averse GMs.
The world junior championship will officially get underway on Monday, and Team Canada has been playing exhibition games all week as they look to rebound from a disappointing showing last year.
If you’re a Maple Leafs fan with an eye on the future, there’s not all that much to get excited about at this year’s tournament. Nikita Korostelev will be there for Team Russia, as will Jeremy Bracco for Team USA. But with eligible players like Auston Matthews and Mitch Marner already lightning it up in the NHL, there won’t be much of the Leafs’ future on display. And there won’t be any Leaf prospects at all on Team Canada.
Honestly, that might be a good thing. While Team Canada has had its ups and downs over the years at the WJC, it’s rarely had anything in the way of good news for Leaf fans. In a good year, the team wouldn’t carry any Toronto prospects at all. In a bad year, they’d find a creative way to punch Leaf fans in the gut.
Today, let’s relive some of that trauma with a look back at the various ways that Team Canada has made Leaf fans sad.
***
1991
We’ll start our history lesson back in the 90s, since before then it was relatively rare to find Leafs property at the world juniors. That’s because back then, most Leaf prospects were rushed into the NHL lineup right away, which is why players like Wendel Clark and Luke Richardson only made appearances before they were Maple Leaf property. We did get an early peak at names like Russ Courtnall and Gary Leeman in the early 80s, but not many Canadians were paying attention then.
They were by 1991, though, and for most of the nation that year’s tournament stands as a classic. It came down to a final-game gold medal showdown with the Soviets, one that Canada won on a late goal by the immortal John Slaney. It marked the first time in Canadian history that they’d won back-to-back gold medal.
But if you were a Leafs fan, the tournament was… well, let’s say bittersweet. For one, this was the year that Eric Lindros truly arrived as the most dominant prospect in the world, living up to his status as the presumed top pick in the 1991 draft. That should have been good news for the Leafs, given that they were terrible. But they’d already traded that pick in a disastrous trade that would leave them scrambling to claw their way out of last place overall. They eventually would, just barely, and ended up missing out on another Canadian star from this tournament in Scott Niedermayer.
The Leafs did have a prospect of their own on Team Canada. That would be Scott Thornton, taken third overall in the infamous 1989 draft that saw Toronto load up on Belleville Bulls. He was on loan from the big club after scoring just one goal in 23 games; it would be the only goal he’d ever score for the Leafs, as he was part of the Grant Fuhr trade package a few months later.
Meanwhile, the Leafs came away impressed by another Canadian prospect, one who tied with Lindros for the team lead in goals. That was Mike Craig, who’d they pluck away from the Stars a few years later in a terrible RFA signing.
There was one bright side to the tournament, although you’d have to look hard to find it at the time. While Trevor Kidd got six of the seven starts in goal, a Leafs prospect did manage to earn the back-up job and get into a single game. That was a kid named Felix Potvin, who ended up being pretty important in a few years.
Puck Soup is a podcast featuring me and Ryan Lambert. We release one free episode each week during the season, plus mailbags and other bonus episodes for Patreon subscribers.
"Biscuits" was the Vice Sports hockey podcast, hosted by DGB and Dave Lozo. It ran for two seasons; the final episode was in July, 2018. You can find the archives below:
