Ranking the OGWACs

As we inch our way through the NHL playoffs and draw closer to the appearance of the Stanley Cup, we’ve reached the point when we can get started on one of hockey’s most cherished springtime traditions: It’s time to start hunting OGWACs.

That stands for “Old Guy Without a Cup,” the beloved specimen of hockey player who finally finds himself on the verge of his first championship after a long career. Fans love OGWACs. Their teammates love them, too; they’re often the first guy to get their hands on the Cup when it’s passed around. The greatest OGWAC story ever told is that of Ray Bourque back in 2001, when he finally lifted the Cup in his very last NHL game after 22 Hall of Fame seasons. Other memorable OGWACs include Teemu Selanne in 2007 and Lanny McDonald in 1989; just about every team that wins a Cup has one or two.

But which of this year’s OGWACs should fans be rooting for? Let’s take a look at all the players still left in the playoffs who are (a) over 30 years old, (b) in at least their 10th NHL season, (c) playing a regular role for their team, and (d) lacking a Cup ring. By my count, that gives us 12 guys to consider. And while any of them would make for a good story, some would be better than others.

Antoine Vermette, Blackhawks

Experience: At 32, he’s finishing up his 11th NHL season.

Near miss: He was a kid on the 2007 Senators team that made it to the final. He was also part of the 2012 Coyotes team that made a surprise run to a conference final.

Sympathy factor: If you’re a Hawks fan? Not high. Vermette was the team’s big trade-deadline acquisition, and he’s been a bust so far.

OGWAC rating: 1/10. Wait, how is it that Antoine Vermette is 32 years old but still looks exactly the same as he did in his rookie year?

Tomas Fleischmann, Ducks

Experience: The 10-year veteran turned 31 on Saturday. Happy birthday, Tomas!

Near miss: Fleischmann was a member of those Washington Capital teams that suffered playoff collapses in 2009 and 2010, then was shipped out as part of the misguided shakeup that followed.

Sympathy factor: He suffered a blood clot in 2009 that threatened to derail his career, but recovered.

OGWAC rating: 2/10. Fleischmann is a likable enough player. But he’s been a Duck only since the trade deadline, so even if Anaheim wins he’s going to have to wait at the back of the line for his Cup handoff.

Matt Carle, Lightning

Experience: He’s 30 and finishing off his 10th NHL season.

Near miss: He was part of the 2010 Flyers team that made a surprise run to the final, then lost on an overtime goal by a former no. 1 overall pick that they would have drafted if they hadn’t lost the lottery three years earlier. I feel like we don’t make a big enough deal out of that one when we’re talking about brutal losses in recent sports history.

Sympathy factor: He wants to win a Stanley Cup, but he’s spent most of his career with the Sharks and Flyers.

OGWAC rating: 3/10. Should we be at all concerned that the Lightning apparently looked at their leaky blue line and thought, You know what would fix this? Ex-Flyers!

Braydon Coburn, Lightning

Experience: He’s 30 and in his 10th season.

Near miss: He was a teammate of Carle’s on that 2010 Flyers team.

Sympathy factor: Ideally, you’d like an OGWAC to have overcome some sort of personal adversity at some point in their career. In Coburn’s case, he was drafted by the Thrashers.

OGWAC rating: 2/10. He’s only 30. Give him a few more years and he’d be a decent pick.

Kevin Klein, Rangers

Experience: He’s 30 years old and in his 10th NHL season.

Near miss: Like many of this year’s Rangers, his closest call came last season when New York made it to the final before losing to the Kings in five. He also had a couple of trips past the first round with the Predators.

Sympathy factor: He had to recover from a broken arm to make it back into the Rangers’ lineup last round. There’s also this, via Wikipedia: “On December 9, 2014, Klein lost part of his left ear on a high stick in the first period of a game against the Pittsburgh Penguins. He had it stitched back on, came back to play, then scored the game-winning goal in overtime.”

OGWAC rating: 4/10. How can you root against a guy who’s basically the NHL’s Mick Foley?

>> Read the full post on Grantland

The end of enforcers

When I was growing up as a hockey fan in the ’80s, I knew every enforcer on every team. I could rattle off 30 or 40 names if you asked me to, and quite possibly even if you didn’t. I had them listed in order of ability on a page tucked away in the back of a notebook, and when I got bored during class, I’d update the rankings based on the most recent fights.

I got the latest release of Don Cherry’s Rock’em Sock’em Hockey for Christmas every year, and still do to this day. I own a custom-made Craig Berube no. 16 Toronto Maple Leafs jersey, quite possibly the only one still in existence. I can remember going into the bank with my allowance to figure out how to buy a money order so I could mail away for the Wayne Gretzky Hockey fight disc. In college, without easy access to cable TV and long before the days of YouTube, I learned how to connect with VHS tape traders so my friends and I could get caught up on the latest bouts.

I tell you all of this not out of pride or embarrassment or even because I think it’s all that interesting, but because I want you to know that when it comes to hockey fights, as George Carlin would say, my credentials are in good order. That’s important, because I loved enforcers back then, and even more, I hated lectures from snobby anti-fighting sportswriters who clearly had never enjoyed a good honest scrap in their life and had no right to talk down their noses to those of us who did.

All of which makes it a very strange experience to write these words: The NHL’s enforcer era is coming to an end, and I’m happy about that. I don’t want those guys in the game anymore.

Let’s start with some recent background for those getting caught up with the shift in the landscape. The NHL has always been a copycat league, and these days the trend is toward teams that can roll four lines that can all be trusted with meaningful ice time. That doesn’t leave much room for designated fighters, and teams have begun dropping them from the lineup. And because the tough guys are there at least part to neutralize other tough guys, each one that loses a job makes it tougher for the next guy to justify his. This summer seemed be the tipping point. The Bruins moved on from Shawn Thornton, the Maple Leafs demoted Colton Orr, and longtime tough guys like Krys Barch, Paul Bissonnette, and Kevin Westgarth all find themselves out of the NHL.

We’re not talking about the end of fighting altogether — at least not yet — but rather of the one-note heavyweight, the guy who’s there to drop the gloves and maybe throw a hit or two, and not much else. The job hasn’t been entirely eliminated; a handful of teams are still holdouts, especially in the Western Conference, and there are more than a few dissenting voices. But when even longtime advocates like Mike Milbury are jumping ship, it’s hard not to see this as less of a temporary trend and more of a permanent change.

All of which takes me back to those days of worshiping the game’s heavyweights, when we’d devour the highlights of the latest matchups and wage impassioned debates over whether Kocur could really hold his own against Kordic. Back then, I couldn’t have imagined a world in which I wouldn’t want those guys in the league.

Not everyone agreed; even then, there were always plenty of media voices railing against the NHL’s culture of violence. But most fans didn’t listen and most of the league’s decision-makers didn’t seem to care. The game needed its enforcers, the thinking went; they kept the rest of the players honest. Hockey was a dangerous game, but you were more likely to keep your stick down and your elbows in if you knew there was a monster at the end of the other bench waiting to hold you accountable.

That was most people’s arguments, but it was never mine. I didn’t doubt it, since it was everywhere, but it wasn’t my case to make, because I never played at a high enough level to know whether it was true of false. And it didn’t really matter, because I had a better reason to cheer on the enforcers and the chaos they caused: It was fun. It made the game more entertaining.

Some people recoil at that sort of argument, as if enjoying a fight just for the sake of it was unseemly. I never really understood why that was. The NHL, like all pro leagues, is an entertainment product; as much as we’d like to assign a higher purpose to our sports, the fact is that as soon as people stop enjoying them and wanting to pay to see them, they go away. If something makes the game more entertaining to enough people, then by definition it has value.

And as a fan, I always thought the enforcers were just about the most entertaining guys. I loved the whole package: the debates over who was the heavyweight champ, and who was next in line in the top contender’s spot; the quick scan of the lineup cards in an attempt to figure out who might pair off; the buzz in an arena when two tough guys lined up next to each other on a faceoff. The third period of a 6-1 blowout could be boring and unwatchable, but mix in a little bad blood and the possibility of a score to settle and it became can’t-miss TV.

That the enforcers were often the smartest guy on the team, and inevitably seemed to be the most active in the community, only added to the appeal. They’d serve up those patented death glares on the ice, but big smiles off of it. They loved their jobs, which is how you knew everything was OK.

When fighting started to drop, the game’s entertainment value dropped in my eyes. I know I wasn’t alone — find any classic scrap on YouTube and check the comments for disaffected fans bemoaning the loss of what the NHL used to be — but it quickly became apparent it wasn’t the sort of thing you were supposed to say out loud. So we argued about safety and rats and “policing the game” instead.

That stuff was important, but it wasn’t really the point. Fighting was just fun, and that was all that mattered. And I felt that way, and I made that case whenever I could, right up until it wasn’t fun anymore.

>> Read the full post on Grantland

Buyers and sellers at the 2012 trade deadline

The Gill for Geoffrion trade featured a player
who shares a last name with one of the greatest
players in NHL history. And also, Blake Geoffrion.

The countdown to the 2012 trade deadline has reached single digits, with just nine days remaining until the big day. Only a handful of deals have been made so far and most of the top names rumored to be in play are still available, so fans can expect plenty of teams to be busy between now and February 27.

Of course, “busy” will mean different things to different teams. Some are planning to stock up for a run at a championship. Others have thrown in the towel on the season and will be looking to rebuild for the future. And of course, there’s a third group: the ones who haven’t decided which of the first two groups they fit into yet. Those teams have nine days left to figure it out.

So where does your favorite team fit? Here’s a handy guide to which teams are likely to be buying and which ones will be selling in the days ahead.

Buyer: Chicago Blackhawks – General manger Stan Bowman has repeatedly told reporters that he isn’t looking to add a goaltender so the team will presumably focus on a more pressing need, such as a GM who realizes that they desperately need a goaltender.

Seller: San Jose Sharks – Recently acquired Dominic Moore for a second round draft pick, so as per NHL rules must now focus all their efforts on trading away Dominic Moore for a second round draft pick.

Buyer: New York Rangers – Have recently come under heavy pressure to make a major move from local newspapers, but only on the strict condition that the player they acquire have at least one syllable in his name that rhymes with “Lin”.

Read the rest of this post...

Accurate NHL predictions: Hard, but not impossible.

There's been some confusion over my recent post about NHL predictions that I'd like to clarify. While I argued that the endless predictions by so-called experts were generally pointless and almost always laughably wrong, I wasn't trying to imply that hockey predictions are never accurate.

In fact, some experts really do seem able to predict the future with an almost creepy degree of accuracy. It's rare, yes, but it does happen.

Here are three examples, chosen completely at random.

Source: Behind the scenes: the Leafs deadline day war room (March 2009)
Prediction: "A confused Pavel Kubina phones to ask why the guy in charge putting together the Atlanta Thrashers 2009 media guide just showed up to take his picture."
Reality: Four months later, Pavel Kubina is traded to the Atlanta Thrashers.

Source: 10 Random Leafs predictions (October 2008)
Prediction: "...this year, Blake looks sharp. Whether he's come to grips with his medical issues or just decided to refocus after a tough year he's looked good in the pre-season. Here's betting that he puts together a decent year -- let's say 25 goals."
Reality: Jason Blake puts together a decent year, and scores 25 goals.

Source: Five games in... (October 2008)
Prediction: "Dominic Moore is playing so well that I'm going to give him a new nickname: Dominic 'Second Round Pick at the 2009 Deadline' Moore."
Reality: Six months later, Moore is traded for a second round pick at the 2009 deadline.

So as you can see, it's not impossible to make amazingly accurate predictions. It's just that you need to be really, really smart. And witty. And also handsome.

What went wrong? Excuses from the NHL's losers

Almost seven full months after the start of the regular season, we are down to eight. Eight teams with a shot at the greatest trophy in all of sports. Eight teams, each well and truly worthy of being celebrated.

But of course, that's not how things work around here. Because there are also eight teams that have just been sent home, not to mention 14 more that didn't even make the playoffs. That makes 22 teams that didn't manage to win so much as one single round.

In other words, 22 losers.

What happened? What went wrong? I decided to find out. So I used my connections to reach out to each team, and asked them to provide an official excuse for their failure. Here's what they told me:


Phoenix Coyotes - Wayne Gretzky's entire coaching style involves playing a video of himself from 1983, pointing at screen, and yelling "do that!"

Tampa Bay Lightning - Everyone always told us to always ask selves "What Would Gary Roberts Do?", so we quit mid-way through the season.

St. Louis Blues - Could not realistically have been expected to overcome crushing mid-season loss of Lee Stempniak.

Florida Panthers - Heard rumors that Florida fans react to playoff success by pelting players with rodent carcasses.

Calgary Flames - Despite tireless efforts to prepare for opponents, were caught off-guard by Blackhawks' never-before-seen trick play called "Martin Havlat actually does something in the playoffs".

New York Islanders - Gosh, hard to say. Suppose it could have had something to do with not having any NHL-caliebe players on the roster.

Ottawa Senators - Gave up after captain Daniel Alfredsson privately guaranteed team would miss playoffs, because man, that guy is never wrong.

Atlanta Thrashers - Like everyone else in the hockey world, completely forgot we existed.

Columbus Blue Jackets - Are a young team that is still learning how to win in the playoffs. For example, this year we learned that it's a really bad idea to play the Detroit Red Wings.

Nashville Predators - Were distracted by concerns that team could be bought by somebody deemed unacceptable by Gary Bettman, such as a person with actual money and no criminal record.

Buffalo Sabres - Not sure where it came from, but this new Dominic Moore guy has an overpowering case of the loser cooties.

Los Angeles Kings - Were confused by NHL's increasingly strict interpretation of rulebook. For example, did you know that in really important games referees can now call a penalty when you hit somebody in the face with your stick?

Dallas Stars - Must have been some sort of conspiracy between Tony Romo and Jason Witten.

San Jose Sharks - Instead of rousing pre-game speech or quiet moment of reflection on task at hand, franchise player Joe Thornton uses final moments before every playoff game to run around locker room shrieking "I have the nervous poos!"

New York Rangers - After game four, realized that choking horrifically would be the only way to get media to stop talking about Sean Avery for three minutes.

New Jersey Devils - Should probably have reconsidered team's inspirational playoff slogan of "59 minutes? Sure, close enough!"

Edmonton Oilers - If his text messages aren't returned promptly, owner Daryl Katz will crush a player's morale by de-friending them on Facebook.

Minnesota Wild - Heart-pounding tempo of Jacques Lemaire's quick strike offensive game plan impossible to sustain over full season.

Colorado Avalanche - Employ Andrew Raycroft.

Toronto Maple Leafs - Sorry, couldn't hear your question. The acoustics are bad in this giant vault full of sweet, sweet money.

Philadelphia Flyers - Referees killed us. Which, I suppose, makes us even.

Montreal Canadiens - Many players suffered from chronic back problems and strained groins due to franchise spending entire season trying to blow itself.

Top 10 Leafs moments of 2008-09

While General Borschevsky largely beat me to the punch on this with his excellent rundown of The Top Ten Leaf Games of the Year, I'm taking a slightly different approach with my list. The idea here is to capture the ten best moments on the Leafs season.

A note: While I haven't limited the list to just on-ice plays, I've only included moments that Leafs fans could have actually witnessed. So things like "Burke accepts GM's job" or "Leafs sign Tyler Bozak" or "somebody tells Damien Cox to start doing video blogs or he's fired" won't be on the list.

#10 - Schenn destroys Vermette

This was one of the first signs that the Leafs really had something in Luke Schenn. Well, that and the way all the statues in Toronto cried tears of blood when he was drafted.

The Senators later traded Vermette for violating the team's strict "never be involved in any physical contact" rule.

#9 - Moore's stickless breakaway

Even though they didn't score, two things about this Dominic Moore "breakaway" get it a spot on the list. First, it was something I'd never seen before in 25+ years as a hockey fans. And second, it may have helped convince the Sabres that it would be a good idea to trade a high draft pick for Dominic Moore. Oops.

Hey, speaking of inanimate objects being brilliantly kicked around...

#8 - Wilson vs Berger

Leaf fans threw in the towel on Berger earlier in the year after he wrote a bizarre blog post insulting fans and bragging about how much money he makes. But fans got the last laugh when Berger was eviscerated by Ron Wilson in a post-game press conference for suggesting that late season Leafs games didn't matter.

On the subject of one-sided fights..

#7 - Mayers vs Kotsopoulos

Everyone remembers Tom Kotsopoulos' attempted murder on Mike Van Ryn. In the next game between the two teams, the only question was which Leaf would be first in line for payback. Jamal Mayers won the race, narrowly beating out Brad May who decided to beat up the next Canadien who made eye contact with him instead.

Later that same game...

#6 - Grabovski flips off Habs fans

I'm on record as not being a fan of Grabosvki's whole "hold me back" routine, which ended with him getting a three-game suspension for his tickle-fight with a linesman. That's not the moment I'm recognizing here.

But all that said, his flip off to Habs fans gets funnier every time you see it. This would seem bush league if anyone else did it, but Grabovski already seems like such an annoying little dink that it somehow ends up being high comedy.

Incidentally, Grabovski later explained that he held up two fingers at Habs fans to signal how many of their players would later be found to be palling around with mobsters.

#5 - Hagman's shift

Fall down, get hit in the face with the puck, deke out entire team, score. Not sure what the big deal was, actually, since I do two of those things pretty much every shift I take.

Bonus points for completely no-selling the celebration. If that had been Jason Blake, he'd still be fist-pumping like a teenage boy who just got internet access for the first time.

#4 - Schenn destroys Malkin

Here's a few tips about playing against Luke Schenn:

1. Keep your head up.
2. If you fail to follow rule #1, check to see if you're still alive.
3. If so, warn your teammates not to try to fight Luke Schenn because he will kill them.

Malkin, needless to say, goes 0-for-3.

Luke Schenn's left hand is the second worst thing to ever happen to a Kennedy's skull.

#3 - Fans say "thank you" to Mats Sundin

My thoughts on Sundin are well known to readers. But it can still be said that the Leafs handled his return perfectly, and this ovation was as memorable as it was well-deserved.

I can't remember whether the Leafs won that night. I must have blocked it out for some reason.

#2 - Curtis Joseph's final stand

In a Leafs season that was about watching for signs of a future, it was nice to have a chance to say an on-ice goodbye to one of most important players in recent franchise history. We got that chance during the bizarre game against the Caps that saw Curtis Joseph play six minutes, make 87 saves, punch Alex Ovechkin in the throat, and score the shootout winner.

Years from now, we will all agree to pretend this was Cujo's final appearance with the Leafs.

#1 - Wendel Clark's banner is raised

This one probably won't come as much of a surprise to anyone since as you may know, I kind of like Wendel Clark.

What? No, don't be silly man, I'm just having some trouble with a contact lens. Anyone have a tissue?

Honorable mentions: The Gilmour ceremony, Brad May's 1000th game, Nikolai Kulemin scoring his first NHL goal on a nice backhand-forehand move that we'd later learn was the only one he has, Johnny Mitchell single-handedly beating the Rangers, Brian Burke watching a fight with binoculars, and the three dozen ridiculous highlight reel goals the Leafs managed to score in shootouts without ever actually winning one.

The Toronto Maple Leafs in the community

Our friends at PPP had a nice writeup about Luke's Troops, a program in which Leafs' rookie Luke Schenn donates a pair of seats for each game to a member of the Canadian Armed Forces returning home from service.

While this program is certainly admirable, it got me wondering about what other types of charitable donations and community service the Leafs are up to. So after making a few phone calls, I've compiled this list of programs that current and recent members of the Maple Leafs organization are involved in.

Burkie's Boys
A local orphanage receives a donation of a nickel every time Leafs GM Brian Burke makes a media appearance. Note: shortly after the trade deadline, the orphanage relocated to a small Caribbean island they'd purchased.

Howard Helps Out
Leafs beat reporter Howard Berger donates his time to the local sick kids hospital. This program has been dormant for several months, since Berger did all his giving in November when it actually mattered.

Fergie's Friends
Selected charities are given the opportunity to approach former Leafs GM John Ferguson with a request for what they feel would be a fair donation. Ferguson then immediately responds by offering them triple that amount, every year, for all of eternity.

It Could Be Worse
Victims of serious car crashes, workplace accidents and other life-altering injuries are shown videos of Wendel Clark fighting guys like Dave Mackey, Slava Fetisov and Bob Brooke, and come away realizing that things could be a lot worse.

The Martin Gerber Second Chance Program
Out-of-work derelicts who have been deemed unemployable due to a lack of marketable skills are given an opportunity to work again. Note: Gerber himself is not actually involved in this charity; it's named after him because he was the program's first recipient.

Kyle's Kupboard
This popular program by former Leaf Kyle Wellwood encouraged fans to drop potato chips and candy bars into a large box near Wellwood's locker. While nobody's sure exactly which food bank received the donations, they obviously worked fast because by the next day there was never anything left but empty wrappers and crumbs.

The Mats Sundin "Entire Journey" Program
This program was established by Mats Sundin when he first arrived in Toronto fifteen years ago. As of today, no final decision has been made on the campaign's format, goals and participants.

Pogge's Posse
Young fans who would otherwise have only a slim hope of ever being part of a Maple Leafs game at the ACC are invited to spend some time commiserating with Marlie's goalie Justin Pogge, who informs them that he can definitely relate.

Gabbing with Grabby
Mikhail Grabovski speaks at local high schools, reminding socially challenged kids that it's still possible to be marginally successful in your chosen career even though you're generally creepy and weird and everybody you meet feels a strong urge to punch you.

Blake's Buddies
Jason Blake speaks to cancer patients about his own battle with the disease, giving practical advice such as "Make sure you sign your $20M contract before the final tests come back," and "Look on the bright side, at least this will give everyone something to talk about instead of your albinoism".

The NHL's Revenue Sharing Program
Don't spend it all in one place, Phoenix.

Habitat for Kubanity
Leafs defenceman Pavel Kubina performs advocacy work on behalf of Toronto's many homeless squatters, due to his deep personal empathy for people who absolutely refuse to leave a hopeless situation even though it's obvious that nobody wants them there anymore.

Rolling the Dice With Dominic
Buffalo Sabres forward Dominic Moore returns to Toronto periodically to lecture on the dangers of gambling, delivering a moving speech called "How trying to get a little more money can unexpectedly result in you winding up stuck in a terrible hellhole that reeks of misery and hopelessness".

Mike Van Ryn Inspirational Hospital Visits
In an attempt to raise spirits and bring a sense of hope to a difficult situation, local children go to the hospital to visit Mike Van Ryn.

Behind the scenes: the Leafs deadline day war room

Hockey fans love trade deadline day, even though few of us will ever know what really goes on behind the scenes.

Well, I decided to find out. So with the help of some top secret internal sources (thanks Cliff!), I was able to plant several microphones and hidden cameras around the Maple Leafs war room on deadline day.

What follows is a never-before-seen level of detail on what an NHL front office looks like on the busiest day of the year.

8:45 a.m. - Leafs GM Brian Burke arrives early, and immediately begins furiously working the phones in an attempt to line up his media appearances for the day.

9:24 - Leafs assistant GM Dave Nonis takes a call from a rival GM asking what the Leafs would want in exchange for Luke Schenn. While talks are initially encouraging, they ultimately fail after Nonis is still listing players and picks when the 3:00 deadline passes.

10:00 - Concerned about the recent winning streak and its impact on draft position, Burke meets with Vesa Toskala in the parking lot to suggest that the red-hot goalie should go on the IR. When Toskala protests that he's not injured, Burke nods in the direction of Tim Hunter, who emerges from the shadows holding a baseball bat.

10:05 - Vesa Toskala agrees that he needs to go on the IR.

10:32 - Burke calls Montreal GM Bob Gainey, only to find out that Gainey has taken the day off.

10:57 - For the fifth time that day, a rival GM calls the Leafs front office asking to speak with John Ferguson Jr. and is devastated to learn he no longer works there.

11:12 - Burke calls Panthers GM Jacques Martin to ask for a scouting report on Jay Bouwmeester, his health records, and information on his salary demands. When Martin asks if he can call him back in an hour, Burke says "no problem, I won't actually need any of this until July 1."

11:27 - Struggling somewhat on his first deadline day in a front office, Joe Nieuwendyk accidentally trades himself to the Devils.

11:45 - Disguising his voice, Burke calls Kevin Lowe to ask if Dustin Penner is available, then laughs hysterically at how excited Lowe gets.

12:15 - With a sinking feeling, Leafs assistant GM Jeff Jackson realizes that the note on his desk that reads "Jeff, please pick up Gerber" is not actually in Brian Burke's handwriting, seems to be from his wife, and probably refers to baby food.

12:37 - Burke takes a break to update his hilarious DownGoesBrown twitter parody.

12:56 - A confused Pavel Kubina phones to ask why the guy in charge putting together the Atlanta Thrashers 2009 media guide just showed up to take his picture.

1:05 - The entire Leafs front office gathers around a computer to read Eklund's latest updates on Hockeybuzz, gaining valuable insight into which rumored trades are guaranteed not to happen.

1:20 - Burke steps out for some fresh air. Upon seeing a homeless panhandler pathetically begging for scraps of food and spare change, Burke makes a mental note to start calling southern market teams to see if he can buy their draft picks.

1:45 - A fellow GM calls to ask Burke if he'd be interested in a Lee Stempniak deal. After Burke angrily explains that the last thing he needs is some underachieving fourth-liner, the other GM is forced to awkwardly break the news that Stempniak has been playing for the Leafs for four months.

2:11 - While discussing details of a proposed Nik Antropov deal, New York GM Glen Sather offers to throw in a conditional draft pick if the Rangers make it to the conference finals.

2:14 - After three straight minutes of listening to Burke laugh and pound the table, Sather informs him that he was actually serious about that.

2:42 - In a tragic misunderstanding, Burke responds to Dominic Moore's plea that "I just want to play in front of 19,000 diehard Leaf fans every night" by trading him to Buffalo.

2:57 - With only minutes to go until the deadline, Burke turns down last-minute offers of a second round pick for Ian White, and a first round pick for Ian White's moustache.

3:45 - As he prepares for his post-deadline press conference, the rest of the front office bets Burke that he can't talk about fielding offers for Tomas Kaberle and claim that he never asks players to waive their NTCs in the same sentence without at least somebody in the Toronto media catching on.

5:30 - Sitting alone at the arrivals gate of the Nashville International Airport, a confused Alex Ponikoravsky wonders why nobody is coming to pick him up.

6:30 - Before heading home after a busy day, Burke slides a slice of stale bread under the door of the storage closet where Richard Peddie has been kept chained and bound since November.

Burke fails to impress

So Brian Burke's first trade deadline with the Maple Leafs has come and gone, and it could be described as "underwhelming".

He had to trade pending UFAs Moore and Antropov, and he managed to get a couple of second rounders in return (the conditional pick in the Antropov deal is a fourth rounder that apparently only kicks in if the Rangers go to the semi-finals). And he added an additional pick from the Lightning.

Other than that, nothing. And in this case, nothing just isn't enough.

There were any number of rabbits Burke could have pulled out his hat today, and he came up empty:

• Find somebody will to pay his ransom for Tomas Kaberle? Nope, although maybe you give a pass there due to the hand injury.
  
• Trade a young-ish veteran like Ian White or Alex Ponikarovsky? Nope.
  
• Find a GM in panic mode to take Jason Blake's contract off his hands? Nope.
  
• Find a new home for veteran grinder Jamal Mayers? Nope.
  
• Throw us all a curveball by doing something unexpected? Don't be silly.

He does get credit for an unusual deal with the Lightning that sees the Leafs essentially buy a fourth round pick and a middling prospect. That was at least creative, a sign that Burke was at least trying to make things happen.

In the end, all Burke managed to do with the current roster was move the team's only two UFAs. And he couldn't even get as much as he'd hoped for those two.

Not one single prospect to get excited about. No first round picks. No deals that will have any impact at all on next year's cap situation.

In fairness, the trading landscape in the NHL these days is a tough one. The cap made things hard, and the coming financial meltdown makes it worse. We were reminded of this a dozen times today. We get it.

But at the same time, just because the class is difficult doesn't mean the students get an A for showing up. If the job was going to be easy, Burke wouldn't be making the big bucks to do it.

Are the Leafs in significantly better long-term shape now than they were yesterday? Are they even significantly different than they were the day Burke took over? If so, I'm not seeing it.

And yes, over the next few days anyone who expected anything more than this will be lectured about having unrealistic expectations. The experts will shake their heads over dumb Leaf fans who actually thought that a rebuilding team would use the deadline to, you know, rebuild.

We'll be reminded that Burke isn't really a "deadline guy". Which is fine, when you're a buyer. But sellers needs to be deadline guys because that's when prices are highest. If Burke couldn't find a buyer today for more of his assets, then either he's not much of a salesman or the assets are in worse shape than we thought.

Either way, let's give Burke a C- on the day.

So what now? Well, first we ride out the last few weeks of the season. Then we sit through those games that come after the season -- can't remember what they're called, I think it starts with "p" but it's been a while.

And then on to the draft, which is the next day to get excited about on the Leaf calendar. The Leafs will have a chance to draft an elite prospect, and should be in a good position to move up if they choose. There will also be the window to move Kaberle or Kubina to any team in the league, and make any other deals that will continue the rebuild.

Or they may not do much at all. After all, maybe our expectations are too high.

Trade Deadline 2009 Liveblog

I'm a new Leaf. Kind of.

4:35 - That's going to do it for me. Thanks to everyone who stopped by today, and especially to everyone who contributed comments.

I'll be back later tonight with some additional thoughts on an underwhelming day.

4:20 - Have the Leafs acquired Olaf Kolzig? Burke is asked and won't deny it. Sounds like they've taken on his salary.

TSN is reporting: Leafs get Olaf Kolzig, Jamie Heward, Andy Rogers and a 4th rounder from Lightning for Richard Petoit.

Kolzig and Heward are hurt. Rogers is a semi-prospect, so the Leafs get him and a pick in exchange for taking on salary.

Sounds like this one will need some discussion with the NHL and may not be a sure thing to go through.

4:15 - Burke is kind of, sort of apologizing for his comments on Toskala being lazy in practice. But not really.

Premature to talk about Gerber for next year.

Says he can only call up four more guys before the end of the season, due to a "ridiculous, archaic, stupid rule".

Really hammering home the idea that they want to win as many games as they can.

4:10 - Burke says they "turned over every stone". He's not doing cartwheels, but he says it's a good day.

"I didn't get one phone call on Tomas Kaberle."

Going on and on about not asking players to waive their no-trades. I guess Kaberle did it on his own.

Says the summer will be a better time to put a stamp on the team.

Everyone is "scared to death of 2010-11" in terms of contracts and finances.

4:05 - Burke is addressing the media right now. He says there's a third deal that hasn't been announced, but it's "much smaller" and involves a minor leaguer.

Welcome to broadway.

3:35 - A few deals still dribbling in, but no indication of anything major coming.

I'll have a detailed reaction later tonight or tomorrow, but right now it's hard not to feel underwhelmed. On the one day of the year when team's can traditionally sell their assets for the highest possible price, the Leafs wound up with a handful of picks and two waiver pickups.

Yes, it was a tough market, and the buying frenzy we've seen in past years never materialized this time around. That made things difficult on Brian Burke. Then again, he didn't get that great big contract to do the easy stuff.

Think of this way: even with the Muskoka Five disaster, the Leafs arguably did better last year than this year. That's brutal, any way you slice it.

3:20 - TSN says the Leafs are officially done. Two waiver pickups, three drafts picks, and two veterans shipped out.

Did they do enough? Is it a disappointment? What do you guys think?

3:15 - The Moore deal is with Buffalo, for a second rounder.

Apparently the Poni story was false. Sure sounds like these two deals are going to be it for the day.

3:10 - The folks over at PPP are not happy about the Antropov deal. Is a second rounder enough? Tough to say. Word around the NHL is that some GMs thought Antropov was over-rated and wouldn't have been worth re-signing.

Oh wait, that was our GM who said that.

3:05 - TSN says a Moore deal is done. There also reports of Ponikarovsky going to Nashville but no confirmation.

3:00 - And the deadline has passed. But of course, plenty of deals will come in over the next hour or so.

TSN is reporting that Derek Morris has been dealt to the Rangers, and that the Panthers are going to keep Bouwmeester.

2:45 - Antropov to the Rangers per TSN. Apparently it's for a 2nd and a conditional pick.

TSN also says the Leafs are shopping Gerber. Good lord...

2:40 - TSN says the Leafs have been offered 2nd round picks for both Moore and Antropov, and are holding out for more.

Meanwhile, still no word on Jay Bouwmeester being dealt. That will be a horrible, horrible mistake by the Panthers.

2:35 - Digginto the comments...

Tom: "Who will be more disappointed at the end of the day: Leafs fans or Habs fans?"
DGB: Tough call. But of course, if those demanding Habs fans are disappointed then the Bell Centre will be empty, right?

Dan: "Whatever happened to Guerin and Morris?"
DGB: Guerin went to the Penguins. Morris is apparently close to going to the Flyers.

2:30 - Half an hour to go. Brian Burke is making $3M/year with the Leafs. He'll earn a big chunk of that in the next thirty minutes.

Any Leaf fans still holding out hope that this can be a good day?

2:20 - RDS.ca says Neil is going to the Panthers. Presumably Jacques Martin doesn't feel that he destroyed his manhood quite enough when they were both in Ottawa.

2:15 - Apparently the Wings and Sharks are bidding on Chris Neil. Does the loser make a play for Jamal Mayers?

2:00 - "Let's make it clear, having a no-trade clause doesn't seem to make it less likely that you will be traded, it just makes it more likely that you'll have to be asked." - Gord Wilson

"Hey Gord Wilson, go punch yourself in the groin." - Every Leaf fan watching

Don't look at us, Dom, we don't
know if you're traded either.

1:50 - TSN says the Leafs are denying that a Moore deal is done.

1:45 - The Moore story is apparently coming from Tim Wharnsby via the Globe web site. It's clearly true, since the Globe and Mail has made it known that spreading misinformation online is completely unacceptable.

1:40 - Reports are trickling in that Moore is headed to Chicago. No word on what's coming back, and no confirmation from TSN or Sportsnet yet.

1:20 - 100 minutes left until the deadline. So far the Leafs have picked up a bad goaltender and a so-so defenceman off of waivers. Nothing on Moore. Nothing on Antropov. Nothing on Mayers. And no indication of anything else even being discussed.

Time for a morale boost. If you need me, I'll be watching Wendel Clark highlights.

1:15 - So far the big movers are the Flames. The Jokinen deal is official - it's Jokinen and a 3rd from the Coyotes for Lombardi, prospect Brandon Prust and a conditional first rounder. Calgary also picked up Jordan Leopold for Lawrence Nycolat, Ryan Wilson and a 2nd.

Your move, Detroit and San Jose.

A rare photo of Martin Gerber with a puck
in front of him.

12:55 - Mystery solved. Vesa Toskala is going on IR and is done for the year.

Fine. So why exactly was he playing all week?

12:35 - Remember when you saw the first movie in the new Star Wars trilogy? Remember how excited you were, and how you were convinced it would be awesome? Then halfway through you were thinking "Um, this kind of sucks. I really hope this gets better towards the end, or else this whole thing might be a gigantic bust".

I'm kind of getting that vibe right now. You?

(Edit: Further similarities between the Star Wars movie and this trade deadline -- both involve a guy wearing a Darth Vader mask who sucks.)

12:15 - The Leafs have also apparently claimed defenceman Eric Reitz from the Rangers. I have never heard of this player before, so the only thing I can say about him definitely is that he's a better goalie than Martin Gerber.

12:10 - Bruce Garrioch: "Martin Gerber has been absolutely awful in Binghampton. He's been beyond bad... I don't know what the Maple Leafs are thinking. I thought Brian Burke was smarter than this."

12:05 - The Leafs have picked up Martin Gerber on waivers.

I don't even have a joke for this.

11:50 - The Penguins have just acquired Andy Wozniewski. I guess they're making a run for Tavares.

11:30 - TSN is reporting that Olli Jokinen to the Flames is all but done. The holdup may be finding salary cap room. Is this where Burke comes to the rescue to rent Calgary some cap room for a draft pick?

11:25 - From the predictions department: "Dominic Moore is playing so well that I'm going to give him a new nickname: Dominic 'Second Round Pick at the 2009 Deadline' Moore." - That was me, five months ago. Make it happen, Burke.

Too lazy to find a Coyotes photo

11:10 - Re: picks vs prospects.

Chris says: "In general, I would say this isn't a bad policy. However, considering the franchise players to be drafted this year and the fact that Toronto desperately needs new blood, Burke should be more willing to chase some draft picks." But Burke sounds like he doesn't think he can get even a late round first today. Would you still rather have a mid-second pick over a known prospect? Less risk, but less upside.

Tom says: "I disagree with this. If the prospect plays, for example, with Ottawa, then I'd rather have the draft pick." True, although it depends how long he's been there. If you scrub hard enough, you may be able to get the loser stench off.

11:00 - Via Chris Kontos at Cycle Like the Sedins: "Guaranteed, Brian Burke turns this franchise around in a season and half. I saw it with my own eyes across town. I hate you Brian Burke. He will pounce on any other GM who is willing to overpay in the slightest... and then get him to overpay even more."

10:35 - Burke on TSN: "A prospect who's a year away from playing is a better asset than a draft pick." What do you guys think? Agree? Disagree?

10:30 - Pascal Leclaire on being traded to Ottawa: "I've watched their games, and the building is always sold out."

In related news, Pascal Leclaire hasn't watched any Senators games since last year.

10:25 - Breaking news: while I did not win my Roll Up The Rim, I am being strongly encouraged to "please play again". So I must be on the right track.

10:10 - TSN is saying that talks with Moore have broken off, and that he will be traded.

10:00 - And now we have our first deal, with Ottawa sending Antione Vermette to Columbus for goalie Pascal Leclaire and a 2nd. Wonder if that takes the Jackets out of the Antropov running?

9:55 - Scratch Ottawa's Filip Kuba from the trade watch. The Sens have signed him to a 3-year extension at $3.7M/year. This will help fill the critical "be completely unnoticeable but pick up a second assist on a meaningless goal" role for Ottawa. They're apparently also closing in on signing Chris Neil.

James Duthie: "The team has had a horrible year, and now it sounds like there won't be any changes coming".

9:40 - Some talk in the comments about Jason Spezza. Here's my take: the Sens have done everything they could to ruin this kid. Yes, he's lazy. Yes, he hates to backcheck. But he has a ton of skill, and sometimes you just need to let a young kid play. Instead, the Sens wanted him to be a two-way player right away. That's just not how it works for most young players.

If the Sens had hired Pat Quinn (instead of hiring a teenager as coach to protect Bryan Murray's power base), Spezza could have been huge. As it is, I'm not sure he'll ever be as good as he can be on this team.

"You're getting traded today? Dude, me too!"

9:25 - OK, I'm back. I'm ready to dig into my Denny's grand slam takeout. When I was ordering it, I knew it was going to be a terrible mistake that I would regret for a long time, but I couldn't help myself. So I'm already in NHL GM mode.

Pierre McGuire on TSN just said that the Leafs should trade Dominic Moore. Stunning insight there. Meanwhile, the entire panel says that there's no way Burke can get a first rounder for Antropov.

8:00 a.m. - Welcome to the 2009 NHL Trade Deadline liveblog! Or, as it will be know starting at around 11:00, "that thing that somehow seemed like a really good idea on Monday".

Here's how it will work... I'll be updating this post all day long with news, views, rumors and blatant stalling tactics. New updates will go at the top of the post. That means you'll have to reload occasionally to see the latest content. Anyone viewing through the RSS feed should see updates, but you may be a few hours behind. I'll also be making occasional updates at twitter.com/downgoesbrown.

Please jump in to the comments section. I'll be posting and responding to some of the more interesting comments as the day goes on. And if you have trade deadline coverage on your own blog or a site you like, let me know and I'll head over and steal your ideas post a link.

Right now I'm heading out to take Baby Goes Brown to daycare (don't worry, I gave her my ipod touch so she could keep track of the deadline deals). Then it's off to Tim Hortons for a day's supply of coffee, and I should be back in time to really get going around 9:30.

The sales pitch: Why you need to trade for these Leafs

OK, so Brian Burke and I aren't on the best of terms these days. I want to make it up to him.

With the deadline just a week away, Burke is faced with the task of convincing his fellow GMs to trade for various Leaf players. Needless to say, this won't exactly be easy.

Like any good salesman, Burke needs to go into battle with a game plan. So I've put together a list of talking points that he could use to try to sell other GMs on his wares. They're his to use, free of charge. Consider it a peace offering.

According to Google, this is a picture of
Lee Stempniak. No Leaf fan can confirm this.

The player: Lee Stempniak
The sales pitch: Not one of those late-season pickups who will come in and disrupt precious dressing room chemistry by being noticeable in any way.

The player: Jason Blake
The sales pitch: While many have cited the length of his contract as a cause for concern, the actual salary cap implications are hard to predict since the CBA will have expired and been renegotiated three times before his deal finally ends.

The player: Curtis Joseph
The sales pitch: Will immediately begin bolstering the confidence of your offensive players during practice shooting drills.

The player: Tomas Kaberle
The sales pitch: Is so good that some teams have been willing to deal a 23-year-old future 50-goal scorer and a first round pick for him, if you can possibly believe such a thing. Ha ha. Ha. Oh god I hate my life.

The player: Andre Deveaux
The sales pitch: A trade to another team would increase the young enforcer's value by making it possible for him to some day fight Ryan Hollweg, the only player in the entire NHL he is capable of beating

This is a cool photo, except that a defenceman
was winding up at the point when it was taken

The player: Vesa Toskala
The sales pitch: Recent history has shown that every goalie who leaves the Leafs automatically becomes ten times better on their new team. Which, in Toskala's case, would make him a very solid backup down the stretch in the event that your regular backup gets injured.

The player: Nik Antropov
The sales pitch: Inevitable upcoming stint on injured reserve will clear up valuable late season cap space.

The player: Mikhail Grabovski
The sales pitch: Has been described as "fearless", party due to his habit of making risky plays in the open ice but mostly due to his willingness to talk crap about Belarusian mob underlings.

The player: Dominic Moore
The sales pitch: Future free agent can always be resigned before the off-season, which would be a great idea since career fourth-liners who have unexpected career seasons during a contract year almost always go on to maintain that level of success.

The player: Matt Stajan
The sales pitch: Has shown impressive focus; despite playing almost his entire career on embarrassingly awful teams has never complained, become dejected, or acted like he even vaguely cared.

Miscellaneous ex-Avalanche defenceman

The player: Jeff Finger
The sales pitch: Career sixth-defenceman occasionally plays so well that seasoned hockey executives have been known to mistake him for the infinitely better Kurt Sauer.

The player: Alexei Ponikarovsky
The sales pitch: Averaged 20 goals a season from 2005-08, so he'd be reasonably productive as long as your roster is so utterly devoid of talent that you're forced to play him on the first line next to a future hall of famer.

The player: Alex Steen
The sales pitch: Talented young player has shown impressive defensive acumen, occasional offensive flair, and emerging leadership skills. Is also technically now a member of the St. Louis Blues, so we can let him go for a late round draft pick.

The player: Luke Schenn
The sales pitch: Is excellent at defending odd-man rushes. Which will come in handy, since the asking price is your entire roster and a first round pick.

Lie to me

The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you've got it made. --Jean Giraudoux

Say what you will about Ron Wilson and Brian Burke, but we know one thing: they're honest.

If they like you, they'll say so. If not, they'll say that too. And for the most part, that's been a breath of fresh air for Leaf Nation.

The John Ferguson/Paul Maurice era was marked by a relentlessly cynical optimism. Ferguson always liked the team, no matter how bad they looked on paper. Maurice famously thought they were going to make the playoffs and compete for a Cup. And the players always claimed they were just one bad bounce away from being really good.

Burke and Wilson came in started to tell it like it is. I loved it.

But here's the thing about honesty. It's not always the ...

Crap, wait a second, I just remember my wife reads this blog sometimes, and she won't like what I'm about to say. Um, hold on.

Hi honey! Say, have you seen the highlights from the Puppy Bowl? Weren't those little guys adorable? They were so just so scrappy!

OK, now that she's gone, let me get back to my point.

Here's the thing about honesty: it's not always the best policy. Sometimes, telling the truth just for the sake of it is dumb. And Ron Wilson and Brian Burke have been treading into that territory in recent weeks.

First, a little history. From the very start, Ron Wilson has refused to sugarcoat the quality of the roster. He told us in September that the team wouldn't be very good, and he's been proven right. When guys like Matt Stajan, Jason Blake and Tomas Kaberle weren't playing at the level they needed to, Wilson didn't worry about protecting anyone's feelings. He made each guy accountable, the way a good coach should (and bad coaches don't).

When Brian Burke joined the fold, he kept the honesty flowing. He didn't try to shine up a turd.

All that honesty created an atmosphere of accountability for a team that had been missing it for years. Suddenly, a locker room that had become used to being treated with kid gloves had to deal with a stiff dose of reality. Not everyone responded, but most did. And a willingless to tell the cold hard truth meant that when a player did hear praise, they knew they'd earned it.

As recently as a few weeks ago, Wilson and Burke called out goalie Vesa Toskala for his poor practice habits. Good. Toskala's a veteran and he's paid to play at a high level. If he's not committed to doing so, he should hear about.

But recently, Wilson and Burke have gone too far. And now, they may be hurting the team.

First, there was Burke's bizarre announcement that he wasn't interested in resigning Nik Antropov. While there's no doubt Burke meant what he said, his honesty probably didn't accomplish anything beyond lowering Antropov's trade value.

Next up was Dominic Moore. A few days ago, Wilson said that fans were getting "carried away" with Moore's production, and pointed out that he wouldn't be good enough to have the same sort of offensive numbers on a better team. "Scoring points on a really bad team, that's really all it is," Wilson said.

Was Wilson wrong? Probably not. But why dismiss Moore's accomplishments right before the trade deadline? And beyond that, Moore is a long-time fourth-liner who's about to taste unrestricted free agency after a career year -- what kind of coach publicly cuts a guy down under those circumstances?

Then came today's comments from Burke about rookie goalie Justin Pogge. "He has not earned the right to be here," Burke said, going on to explain that Pogge was getting NHL starts primarily to try to motivate Toskala even though the kid didn't really belong in the big leagues.

Again, brutally honest and probably 100% correct. But Pogge is a borderline prospect having an underwhelming AHL season, forced to audition for an NHL role behind a terrible defensive team. He'd hardly be human if his confidence wasn't already shakey. What possible good can come from hearing his GM cut him down to size on the radio?

For the life of me, I can't figure out what these two are thinking with some of the recent comments. So I'll take a cue from Wilson and Burke and try a little honesty myself: They sound like two guys who have suddenly become a little too interested in the sound of their own voices, and have forgotten that they're here to win.

Winning over the media folks who love a good sound bite doesn't go very far towards building a contending team. But a little bit of well-placed B.S. just might.

Lie to me, guys. Or at least play the part of the good husband, and learn when to change the subject.

I may have made a slight miscalculation on this whole Jason Blake thing

There's something you should know about me. When it comes to the Leafs, I'm wrong. A lot.

I've only been blogging for about a year. Which is good thing, because if I'd been around much longer then there would be post in the archives with titles like "Paul Maurice is a perfect hire for the Leafs" and "Rask, Smchask - Why the Raycroft deal is a steal of the Ferguson and the Leafs".

Which brings us to Jason Blake.

It's quite possible that, when it comes to Blake, I was wronger than I've ever been wrong about anything, ever.

Here's a little secret. I keep a short list of posts that I plan on writing, usually with a few notes and sometimes with whole sections pre-written. That way, when things are slow in Leafland or I'm too busy to put any time into something, I can still go find something to post about.

I've had a post on my list all season called "Jason Blake is Playing Great" that I was saving for the weeks leading up to the deadline. It was going to be a long post about how well Blake was playing, how his stats didn't show his true impact, how he was doing all the little things right and making everyone around him better and how with a little bit better luck he'd have fantastic stats.

Then, about an hour after posting that, I was going to do a shorter post with the punch line: that the "Blake is Great" post was a fake, and that Leaf fans should all start writing similar stuff in various places in a co-ordinated effort to fool some dumb fanbase into deciding they wanted him. And then we could be rid of this useless player and his terrible contract. It was worth a shot, right?

Well, let's just say I don't think I'll be writing that post now. Because somehow, some way, in the past two months it's all come true.

Jason Blake is one of the best players in the NHL right now.

I keep reading that last sentence, but my brain can not comprehend it.

But it's true. With a glove tap to article1 over at PPP, here's how Blake compares to Alex Ovechkin in 2009:

Ovechkin - 18GP 13G 9A 22Pts EV
Blake - 19 GP 13G 10A 23Pts +9

I mean... how is this... what could it... gah.

One month ago, I did a mid-season value ranking of all the Leafs, and I had Blake dead last. As in, behind Curtis Joseph and Ryan Holweg. Here's what I wrote:

His play has picked up modestly lately, but he's still a borderline third-liner on any decent team. Given his age and production curve, his contract has to be among the worst in the league.

See? Like I told you, I have the ability to be really, really wrong.

I'd always held out hope that Blake could do enough this year to be worth a trade at the deadline. Not because we'd get anything good in return, but because we could unload his long-term contract and clear up cap space. That was my absolute best possible scenario.

I think we may have gone beyond that. I think it may be time to stop asking if the Leafs can trade Blake, and start wondering how much they can get for him.

At this point, if you're a contender, how do you not want to trade for Jason Blake? Even if this year is a fluke and he falls off a cliff in the off-season, you still get an amazing player for the playoff run. You keep him for another year after that, and then buy him out for a relatively cheap $5.5M spread over four season. That doesn't sound so bad, does it? And that's the worst case.

I'll go one further: if you're a contending team, how do you not want to land Blake and linemate Dominic Moore? The two have been a perfect match, and Moore has 17 points in his past 13 games. We thought Moore was having a career year over the first few months, but it turns out he was just warming up.

Brian Burke should be asking a fortune for speedy center. Which would make it the second time he's put a price on a Moore's head.

(Too soon? OK, moving on.)

Through this entire Blake streak, I've stayed low key. I knew it was all a fluke and he'd go back to being his old, lazy, waste-of-a-roster spot self any day now. But something changed this week. I think it was during the Tampa Bay game, when Blake had a partial breakaway and I was absolutely stunned that he didn't score. I had already counted the goal in my head, because after all, this was the unstoppable Jason Blake.

So I take back all the negative value ratings and "harmless wrist shot" jokes and fake posts that never were. I'm on the bandwagon. I have no idea how this is happening, but Jason Blake is dominating the NHL right now and I'm loving every second of it.

You know, for two more weeks. Right up until Burke trades him at the deadline for a nice little return.

And you can bank on that, because I'm never wrong.

The Prattle of Ontario

Some observations from a Battle of Ontario debacle that may have finally shovelled dirt on this rivalry once and for all, not to mention broken my spirit as a hockey fan.

• The Senators are terrible. I mean, the Leafs are terrible, and they still had a relatively easy time with Ottawa last night. Toronto is bad in a "well, maybe kind of sort of getting better" way. Ottawa is bad in an "abandon all hope ye who enter here" kind of way. Luckily, they have Buffalo next and you can always count on the Sabres to roll over and die in any post-Pominville game against a struggling Sens team.
  
  
• Hey, you know what else is terrible? Leafs/Sens games. I'm seeing lots of stories in the papers and online today describing the game as "gritty". Really? That was gritty? A half dozen guys on each team all trying to play the agitator role, trying to get bumped into and then flopping to the ice and looking for a referee? We call that gritty now? Tie Domi is rolling over in his grave.
  
  
• Word is Sidney Crosby wanted to play in last night's game but couldn't find anyone with two balls to punch.
  
  
• Speaking of which... so Chris Neil thinks that even though the Sens dumped Brian McGrattan and signed Jarkko Ruutu, he should still try to be a "pest" who runs from Kimbo Hollweg but goes after Ian White? Really? He's thinks that's his ticket to sticking around in the NHL? OK, just checking.
  
  
• It's official: Mike Fisher has entered the "golden boy" zone where announcers will refer to him as one of the best players on the ice no matter how awful he is. Yes, he threw some hits. He was also pointless, a minus, and lead both teams in giveaways. Also, he makes $4.2M/year. Through 2013. But he's scored three goals this season, so obviously none of this can be his fault.
  
  
• Yes, Jason Spezza deserved a spearing major based on the rulebook, but he barely touched Dominic Moore and Moore's hunched-over attempt to sell an injury was embarassing. Remember when Toronto didn't do that stuff? At least against Ottawa?
  
  
• And while I don't expect or want Tomas Kaberle to drop his gloves or even give Spezza so much as a girlish shove, wouldn't it be nice if his instinctive first reaction to seeing a teammate get speared wasn't to throw his arms in the air and look for a referee to whine to? Kaberle is the best player on the team, but sometimes he reminds you that he's the holdover from the old "leadership" core.
  
  
• I'll admit, I get way too excited whenever a Leaf goalie tries to score a goal. Unfortunately, Toskala's effort ended up fluttering harmlessly into the air and was easily gloved aside by a defenceman. You know what that means: he could play on the third line of either of these teams!
  

Five games in...

Some quick hits as we round past the 1/16th mark...

• Please stop talking about Luke Schenn's contract situation. It doesn't matter. The decision to keep him in Toronto or send him back to junior has nothing to do with starting the clock on his free agency eligibility.
  
  First of all, it's crazy to make assumptions about what the CBA will be like three or four years from now, let alone seven or eight. We have no idea when Schenn will be a free agent, because we have no idea how the CBA will read in a few years. And for that matter, it doesn't even matter whether Schenn is helping the team. The season is already a writeoff, so who cares if Schenn can add a few wins?
  
  The only factor worth considering is Schenn's development. That's it. Will he develop better in junior than in Toronto? If so, send him there. If not, keep him around. End of story.
  
  If he hits free agency a year early and demands big dollars because he's playing at a superstar level, that will be a problem the Leafs will be happy to have.
  
  
• I want to like Mikhail Grabovski. The kid has some moves, he's fast, and I'd love to chalk up the zero points to bad luck. I want him to a be star. But... um... I'm not getting that vibe yet, you know?
  
  
• Do Jamal Mayers and Ryan Hollweg have some sort of secret sidebet to see which one of them can be the first to get one of their teammates killed?
  
  
• I love the way Ron Wilson is handing out playing time. He's basically throwing his lineup card onto the ice every night and saying "Here, you guys fill this out".
  
  Last night in Pittsburgh, Wilson gave virtually the entire team a shot at powerplay time. That's exactly what he should be doing this early in the season. While Paul Maurice basically handed out ice time based on salary and reputation, Wilson is letting guys play their way in -- or out. Perfect.
  
  
• That said, maybe it would be a good idea for Wilson to ask Cliff Fletcher for a list of guys he's trying to trade and not bench them. Mike Van Ryn, I'm looking in your direction.
  
  
• Nikolai Kulemin is good. Two unassisted breakaway goals and two shootout goals -- if anybody ever figures out how to pass the puck to this kid, look out.
  
  
• Speaking of people who are really good at breakaways, only the exact opposite, why was Matt Stajan taking a shootout on Friday? Did I fall asleep and miss the first 14 rounds of that one?
  
  
• Finally... Dominic Moore is playing so well that I'm going to give him a new nickname: Dominic "Second Round Pick at the 2009 Deadline" Moore.
  

Deadline day: Quick early morning thoughts

• Pavel Kubina is getting bad advice if he refuses to waive. Let's assume the reports of his NTC being lifted in the off-season are true (and not just more confusion, a la Kaberle's no-trade clause). He can either accept a deal now, when he has some control over his destination and would almost certainly go to a contender. Or he can wait until the off-season and go wherever Fletcher wants to send him, with no input and no guarantee he won't wind up in an even worse situation than Toronto.
  
  
• Kyle Wellwood has requested a trade. If possible, he would also like a chocolate milkshake and a bag of funions.
  
  
• I sense I'm on the outside of the Leaf Nation consensus when it comes to the Sundin decision. Fair enough. But this article in the Star captured my feelings today.
  
  
• Am I seeing things, or was there a very odd reaction to Moore's goal last night? Or more specifically, a non-reaction. He scores a one-man highlight reel goal, peels into the corner, raises his arm and... nobody's there. The other players just go to the bench and leave him standing there by himself, looking around, before skating off. Maybe the Leaf players have rejected Moore -- after all, he hasn't been there since October, so Mats doesn't believe he's a real teammate.
  

More to come as the day goes on...