Grab bag: When is a team record not a record?

In the Friday Grab Bag:
- NHL GMs are lying to you, and the NBA trade deadline proved it
- Wait, is Patrik Laine chasing Teemu Selanne's team records or not?
- An obscure player who may have been the worst deadline pickup of all time
- The week's three comedy starts
- And in the YouTube section, things get ugly when a blockbuster trade between two notoriously cranky GMs falls apart.

>> Read the full post Vice Sports

Countdown to opening night: Remaining offseason tasks for the Winnipeg Jets

And nine months later, a beautiful
leafy-airplane baby was born.

The Winnipeg Jets took their latest step in their NHL rebirth on Friday when they released their much anticipated logo. After months of speculation, fans now have a visual representation of Canada's newest team.

The logo was just the latest step in a long process that began in May when the rumoured relocation of the Atlanta Thrashers became reality. Since then the Jets have sold thousands of season tickets, announced their team name, made their first draft picks, hired a new GM and coaching staff, and resigned captain Andrew Ladd.

That's an impressive start, but there's still more to do. Getting a NHL team up and running is a daunting job, and with less than two months until training camp the Jets still have plenty of outstanding items left on their checklist. Here's a sample of some of the work the team still has to do before they hit the ice.

• Create a promotional DVD to get fans excited about young star Evander Kane, which shouldn't take long since it just needs to be a clip of the Matt Cooke fight on a 90-minute loop.
  
  
• Organize some sort of orientation for lifelong Atlanta Thrasher players who will be now dealing with issues they've never faced before such as a harsh climate, Canadian tax laws, and fans.
  
  
• Figure out some way to make ice in time for the home opener on October 9th, since every flat surface in Winnipeg isn't normally covered in several inches of ice until October 15th.
  
  
• File the paperwork to have that playground near the arena renamed "Hey Bryzgalov, enjoy getting booed and pelted with batteries in Philadelphia" Memorial Park.
  

Read the rest of this post...

2009-2010 Season Preview: The Southeast Division

As we count down the final days leading up to the 2009-10 regular season, let's take a look at each of the 30 teams with the official DGB Season Preview. Today, we look at the Southeast Division.

Atlanta Thrashers

The good: The team does, in the strictest technical sense, still exist.
The bad: Their plan to finally make it back to the post-season seems to involve building around former Maple Leafs.
Biggest question mark: How will the team react to the absence of Garnett Exelby, which will force them to play with two defencemen in proper position?
Fearless forecast: A frustrated Ilya Kovalchuk decides to stop passing, hang out at the red line instead of playing defence, and take eight-minute shifts, making him the first player to ever play exactly like you do in NHL 10 "Be A Pro" mode.

Washington Capitals

The good: Alexander Ovechkin seems to finally be coming out of his shell, and may even be willing to participate in occasional off-ice promotional activity.
The bad: I entered "Semyon Varlamov" into a Russian-to-English dictionary, and it came back "Steve Penney".
Biggest question mark: Why does every photograph of Mike Green look like it was taken three seconds after somebody woke him up?
Fearless forecast: The Capitals win 50 games, or more than the Nationals, Wizards and Redskins combined.

Florida Panthers

The good: Recently named Bryan McCabe captain.
The bad: Oops, that last one was supposed to be listed under "the bad". I guess Bryan's not the only one who gets confused about which side things are supposed to go in.
Biggest question mark: With Jay Bouwmeester's departure, which veteran will step up and teach the younger players what it takes to miss the playoffs every single year?
Fearless forecast: A guy who looks oddly like Jim Balsillie starts spending a lot of time in South Florida.

Tampa Bay Lightning

The good: Vincent Lecavlier appears poised for the sort of big year the team had in mind when they signed him to an $80M extension.
The bad: That apparently makes him the only person associated with this franchise who has any actual money.
Biggest question mark: Wouldn't it be better if we all just agreed that the lockout actually started in May of 2004?
Fearless forecast: The Montreal Canadiens make an aggressive deadline push to trade for Martin St. Louis in an attempt to add size.

Carolina Hurricanes

The good: Cam Ward's stellar play continues to indicate that he hasn't yet realized that he's Cam Ward.
The bad: While Ric Flair may be a native South Carolinian, having a crazy old white-haired man scream maniacally is really just an uncreative ripoff of Don Cherry.
Biggest question mark: Does Aaron Ward get one free sucker punch on Scott Walker to use whenever he wants? (Answer: Yes.)
Fearless forecast: The free agent signing of Tom Kostopolous forces coach Paul Maurice to slightly modify his famous quote to "There was a lot of purse stealing out there."

A look ahead at the Maple Leafs 2009-10 schedule

The Maple Leafs 2009-2010 schedule was released today. And since we already have a pretty good idea what all the rosters will look like next year, that means I could spend the afternoon loading everything into the top-secret DGB supercomputer to find out what will happen.

After several hours of flashing lights and whirring noises, I had my answer. Based on today's schedule, here are several highlights from the upcoming Leafs season.

(Warning: The following contains spoilers. If you want to be surprised, stop reading now.)

October 1 - The Leafs play the Montreal Canadiens in the season opener. Sadly, the traditional intermission "timbits" game is ruined when Bob Gainey wanders onto the ice and offers everyone contracts.

October 3 - The Leafs head to Washington. Hoping to catch the Capitals off guard, Ron Wilson gives Justin Pogge the surprise start in net. In a related story, Alexander Ovechkin becomes the first player in the league to reach the 50 goal mark.

October 10 - The Leafs host the Stanley Cup champion Penguins. Unfortunately, Evgeni Malkin and Tyler Kennedy are forced to miss the game after coming down with a bad case of the Schenn Flu.

October 17 - The Leafs host the Rangers, and get their first look at the newly acquired Dany Heatley. "I know some fans don't support me," says Heatley, "but I'm just thrilled to be playing hockey again."

October 17 - 24 - After a gruelling half-month of hockey, the NHL's schedule makers decide that the Leafs need a full week off. Gary Bettman defends the move by explaining "We sensed that fans were really starting to get excited about hockey, and wanted to nip that in the bud."

November 1 - 30 - The Leafs play 13 games during the month. Ron Wilson calls for a stick measurement in every single one, just to annoy Howard Berger.

November 13 - The Leafs head to Chicago for their only game of the season against their longtime rivals. In other Blackhawk news, Dale Tallon starts to get a sinking feeling that he forgot to register his kids for school.

December 7 - Nik Antropov and Pavel Kubina return to Toronto as members of the Atlanta Thrashers. After hours of answering questions about what it was like to play in Toronto, how exciting it was to play in a city that cares about hockey, and how difficult it is now to play in front of so few fans, they finally tell Ilya Kovalchuk to just be quiet and wait for free agency.

December 9 - The Leafs host the Islanders. During an intermission interview, John Tavares attempts to blink out a message asking someone to come rescue him.

December 14 - In a game that recalls the infamous "Flu Game" of 2004, the Leafs are awarded a forfeit win after the Ottawa Senators refuse to take the ice in what will later be known as the "Schenn Flu Game".

December 16 - The Leafs host the Phoenix Coyotes. Jim Balsillie buys every ticket, sits in the front row, and spends the entire game lighting cigars with $100 bills while giving the camera the finger.

December 26 - The Leafs host the Montreal Canadiens on Boxing Day. That ends up being somewhat ironic, since there are several incidents of fisticuffs during the game. And also because every player on the Canadiens goes home in a pine box.

January 8 - The Leafs kick off a four-game homestand with a game in Buffalo.

January 26 - The LA Kings make their only visit to Toronto. Brian Burke leaves early, presumably to catch a flight as he's seen dragging a heavy duffel bag out of the arena. In an unrelated story, the Kings report that Brayden Schenn has gone missing.

January 29 - February 5 - The Leafs play Jacques Lemaire and the Devils three times in one week. Leaf fans look back fondly on that comparatively thrilling week in October when there weren't any games.

February 8 - The Leafs host the Sharks, and get their first look at the newly acquired Dany Heatley. "It's unfortunate that things didn't work out in New York," Heatley says, "but I'm happy to be in San Jose because I'm all about the team."

February 12 - The NHL breaks for the Olympics games, a grueling three-week tournament featuring the very best players from around the world. Or, as the entire Maple Leafs roster calls it, "February".

March 11 - The Leafs host the Lightning, and get their first look at the newly acquired Dany Heatley. "I really think this will be a good fit," Heatley says. "When do the world championships start?"

March 13 - Prior to playing the Leafs, the Edmonton Oilers assure everyone that they're still totally in on the Dany Heatley sweepstakes.

April 4 - The World Health Organization declares Schenn Flu to be a global pandemic. They advise anyone who has ever thought about bodychecking a Leafs player to remain in an underground bunker for the next 15-20 years.

April 7 - The Maple Leafs are mathematically eliminated from the 2011 playoffs.

April 10 - On their way back to Toronto after the season finale, the Leafs stop at a McDonalds drivethru and get their first look at the newly acquired Dany Heatley. "I really think I handled everything well this year," says Heatley. "Would you like fries with that?"

Behind the scenes: the Leafs deadline day war room

Hockey fans love trade deadline day, even though few of us will ever know what really goes on behind the scenes.

Well, I decided to find out. So with the help of some top secret internal sources (thanks Cliff!), I was able to plant several microphones and hidden cameras around the Maple Leafs war room on deadline day.

What follows is a never-before-seen level of detail on what an NHL front office looks like on the busiest day of the year.

8:45 a.m. - Leafs GM Brian Burke arrives early, and immediately begins furiously working the phones in an attempt to line up his media appearances for the day.

9:24 - Leafs assistant GM Dave Nonis takes a call from a rival GM asking what the Leafs would want in exchange for Luke Schenn. While talks are initially encouraging, they ultimately fail after Nonis is still listing players and picks when the 3:00 deadline passes.

10:00 - Concerned about the recent winning streak and its impact on draft position, Burke meets with Vesa Toskala in the parking lot to suggest that the red-hot goalie should go on the IR. When Toskala protests that he's not injured, Burke nods in the direction of Tim Hunter, who emerges from the shadows holding a baseball bat.

10:05 - Vesa Toskala agrees that he needs to go on the IR.

10:32 - Burke calls Montreal GM Bob Gainey, only to find out that Gainey has taken the day off.

10:57 - For the fifth time that day, a rival GM calls the Leafs front office asking to speak with John Ferguson Jr. and is devastated to learn he no longer works there.

11:12 - Burke calls Panthers GM Jacques Martin to ask for a scouting report on Jay Bouwmeester, his health records, and information on his salary demands. When Martin asks if he can call him back in an hour, Burke says "no problem, I won't actually need any of this until July 1."

11:27 - Struggling somewhat on his first deadline day in a front office, Joe Nieuwendyk accidentally trades himself to the Devils.

11:45 - Disguising his voice, Burke calls Kevin Lowe to ask if Dustin Penner is available, then laughs hysterically at how excited Lowe gets.

12:15 - With a sinking feeling, Leafs assistant GM Jeff Jackson realizes that the note on his desk that reads "Jeff, please pick up Gerber" is not actually in Brian Burke's handwriting, seems to be from his wife, and probably refers to baby food.

12:37 - Burke takes a break to update his hilarious DownGoesBrown twitter parody.

12:56 - A confused Pavel Kubina phones to ask why the guy in charge putting together the Atlanta Thrashers 2009 media guide just showed up to take his picture.

1:05 - The entire Leafs front office gathers around a computer to read Eklund's latest updates on Hockeybuzz, gaining valuable insight into which rumored trades are guaranteed not to happen.

1:20 - Burke steps out for some fresh air. Upon seeing a homeless panhandler pathetically begging for scraps of food and spare change, Burke makes a mental note to start calling southern market teams to see if he can buy their draft picks.

1:45 - A fellow GM calls to ask Burke if he'd be interested in a Lee Stempniak deal. After Burke angrily explains that the last thing he needs is some underachieving fourth-liner, the other GM is forced to awkwardly break the news that Stempniak has been playing for the Leafs for four months.

2:11 - While discussing details of a proposed Nik Antropov deal, New York GM Glen Sather offers to throw in a conditional draft pick if the Rangers make it to the conference finals.

2:14 - After three straight minutes of listening to Burke laugh and pound the table, Sather informs him that he was actually serious about that.

2:42 - In a tragic misunderstanding, Burke responds to Dominic Moore's plea that "I just want to play in front of 19,000 diehard Leaf fans every night" by trading him to Buffalo.

2:57 - With only minutes to go until the deadline, Burke turns down last-minute offers of a second round pick for Ian White, and a first round pick for Ian White's moustache.

3:45 - As he prepares for his post-deadline press conference, the rest of the front office bets Burke that he can't talk about fielding offers for Tomas Kaberle and claim that he never asks players to waive their NTCs in the same sentence without at least somebody in the Toronto media catching on.

5:30 - Sitting alone at the arrivals gate of the Nashville International Airport, a confused Alex Ponikoravsky wonders why nobody is coming to pick him up.

6:30 - Before heading home after a busy day, Burke slides a slice of stale bread under the door of the storage closet where Richard Peddie has been kept chained and bound since November.

Burke fails to impress

So Brian Burke's first trade deadline with the Maple Leafs has come and gone, and it could be described as "underwhelming".

He had to trade pending UFAs Moore and Antropov, and he managed to get a couple of second rounders in return (the conditional pick in the Antropov deal is a fourth rounder that apparently only kicks in if the Rangers go to the semi-finals). And he added an additional pick from the Lightning.

Other than that, nothing. And in this case, nothing just isn't enough.

There were any number of rabbits Burke could have pulled out his hat today, and he came up empty:

• Find somebody will to pay his ransom for Tomas Kaberle? Nope, although maybe you give a pass there due to the hand injury.
  
• Trade a young-ish veteran like Ian White or Alex Ponikarovsky? Nope.
  
• Find a GM in panic mode to take Jason Blake's contract off his hands? Nope.
  
• Find a new home for veteran grinder Jamal Mayers? Nope.
  
• Throw us all a curveball by doing something unexpected? Don't be silly.

He does get credit for an unusual deal with the Lightning that sees the Leafs essentially buy a fourth round pick and a middling prospect. That was at least creative, a sign that Burke was at least trying to make things happen.

In the end, all Burke managed to do with the current roster was move the team's only two UFAs. And he couldn't even get as much as he'd hoped for those two.

Not one single prospect to get excited about. No first round picks. No deals that will have any impact at all on next year's cap situation.

In fairness, the trading landscape in the NHL these days is a tough one. The cap made things hard, and the coming financial meltdown makes it worse. We were reminded of this a dozen times today. We get it.

But at the same time, just because the class is difficult doesn't mean the students get an A for showing up. If the job was going to be easy, Burke wouldn't be making the big bucks to do it.

Are the Leafs in significantly better long-term shape now than they were yesterday? Are they even significantly different than they were the day Burke took over? If so, I'm not seeing it.

And yes, over the next few days anyone who expected anything more than this will be lectured about having unrealistic expectations. The experts will shake their heads over dumb Leaf fans who actually thought that a rebuilding team would use the deadline to, you know, rebuild.

We'll be reminded that Burke isn't really a "deadline guy". Which is fine, when you're a buyer. But sellers needs to be deadline guys because that's when prices are highest. If Burke couldn't find a buyer today for more of his assets, then either he's not much of a salesman or the assets are in worse shape than we thought.

Either way, let's give Burke a C- on the day.

So what now? Well, first we ride out the last few weeks of the season. Then we sit through those games that come after the season -- can't remember what they're called, I think it starts with "p" but it's been a while.

And then on to the draft, which is the next day to get excited about on the Leaf calendar. The Leafs will have a chance to draft an elite prospect, and should be in a good position to move up if they choose. There will also be the window to move Kaberle or Kubina to any team in the league, and make any other deals that will continue the rebuild.

Or they may not do much at all. After all, maybe our expectations are too high.

Trade Deadline 2009 Liveblog

I'm a new Leaf. Kind of.

4:35 - That's going to do it for me. Thanks to everyone who stopped by today, and especially to everyone who contributed comments.

I'll be back later tonight with some additional thoughts on an underwhelming day.

4:20 - Have the Leafs acquired Olaf Kolzig? Burke is asked and won't deny it. Sounds like they've taken on his salary.

TSN is reporting: Leafs get Olaf Kolzig, Jamie Heward, Andy Rogers and a 4th rounder from Lightning for Richard Petoit.

Kolzig and Heward are hurt. Rogers is a semi-prospect, so the Leafs get him and a pick in exchange for taking on salary.

Sounds like this one will need some discussion with the NHL and may not be a sure thing to go through.

4:15 - Burke is kind of, sort of apologizing for his comments on Toskala being lazy in practice. But not really.

Premature to talk about Gerber for next year.

Says he can only call up four more guys before the end of the season, due to a "ridiculous, archaic, stupid rule".

Really hammering home the idea that they want to win as many games as they can.

4:10 - Burke says they "turned over every stone". He's not doing cartwheels, but he says it's a good day.

"I didn't get one phone call on Tomas Kaberle."

Going on and on about not asking players to waive their no-trades. I guess Kaberle did it on his own.

Says the summer will be a better time to put a stamp on the team.

Everyone is "scared to death of 2010-11" in terms of contracts and finances.

4:05 - Burke is addressing the media right now. He says there's a third deal that hasn't been announced, but it's "much smaller" and involves a minor leaguer.

Welcome to broadway.

3:35 - A few deals still dribbling in, but no indication of anything major coming.

I'll have a detailed reaction later tonight or tomorrow, but right now it's hard not to feel underwhelmed. On the one day of the year when team's can traditionally sell their assets for the highest possible price, the Leafs wound up with a handful of picks and two waiver pickups.

Yes, it was a tough market, and the buying frenzy we've seen in past years never materialized this time around. That made things difficult on Brian Burke. Then again, he didn't get that great big contract to do the easy stuff.

Think of this way: even with the Muskoka Five disaster, the Leafs arguably did better last year than this year. That's brutal, any way you slice it.

3:20 - TSN says the Leafs are officially done. Two waiver pickups, three drafts picks, and two veterans shipped out.

Did they do enough? Is it a disappointment? What do you guys think?

3:15 - The Moore deal is with Buffalo, for a second rounder.

Apparently the Poni story was false. Sure sounds like these two deals are going to be it for the day.

3:10 - The folks over at PPP are not happy about the Antropov deal. Is a second rounder enough? Tough to say. Word around the NHL is that some GMs thought Antropov was over-rated and wouldn't have been worth re-signing.

Oh wait, that was our GM who said that.

3:05 - TSN says a Moore deal is done. There also reports of Ponikarovsky going to Nashville but no confirmation.

3:00 - And the deadline has passed. But of course, plenty of deals will come in over the next hour or so.

TSN is reporting that Derek Morris has been dealt to the Rangers, and that the Panthers are going to keep Bouwmeester.

2:45 - Antropov to the Rangers per TSN. Apparently it's for a 2nd and a conditional pick.

TSN also says the Leafs are shopping Gerber. Good lord...

2:40 - TSN says the Leafs have been offered 2nd round picks for both Moore and Antropov, and are holding out for more.

Meanwhile, still no word on Jay Bouwmeester being dealt. That will be a horrible, horrible mistake by the Panthers.

2:35 - Digginto the comments...

Tom: "Who will be more disappointed at the end of the day: Leafs fans or Habs fans?"
DGB: Tough call. But of course, if those demanding Habs fans are disappointed then the Bell Centre will be empty, right?

Dan: "Whatever happened to Guerin and Morris?"
DGB: Guerin went to the Penguins. Morris is apparently close to going to the Flyers.

2:30 - Half an hour to go. Brian Burke is making $3M/year with the Leafs. He'll earn a big chunk of that in the next thirty minutes.

Any Leaf fans still holding out hope that this can be a good day?

2:20 - RDS.ca says Neil is going to the Panthers. Presumably Jacques Martin doesn't feel that he destroyed his manhood quite enough when they were both in Ottawa.

2:15 - Apparently the Wings and Sharks are bidding on Chris Neil. Does the loser make a play for Jamal Mayers?

2:00 - "Let's make it clear, having a no-trade clause doesn't seem to make it less likely that you will be traded, it just makes it more likely that you'll have to be asked." - Gord Wilson

"Hey Gord Wilson, go punch yourself in the groin." - Every Leaf fan watching

Don't look at us, Dom, we don't
know if you're traded either.

1:50 - TSN says the Leafs are denying that a Moore deal is done.

1:45 - The Moore story is apparently coming from Tim Wharnsby via the Globe web site. It's clearly true, since the Globe and Mail has made it known that spreading misinformation online is completely unacceptable.

1:40 - Reports are trickling in that Moore is headed to Chicago. No word on what's coming back, and no confirmation from TSN or Sportsnet yet.

1:20 - 100 minutes left until the deadline. So far the Leafs have picked up a bad goaltender and a so-so defenceman off of waivers. Nothing on Moore. Nothing on Antropov. Nothing on Mayers. And no indication of anything else even being discussed.

Time for a morale boost. If you need me, I'll be watching Wendel Clark highlights.

1:15 - So far the big movers are the Flames. The Jokinen deal is official - it's Jokinen and a 3rd from the Coyotes for Lombardi, prospect Brandon Prust and a conditional first rounder. Calgary also picked up Jordan Leopold for Lawrence Nycolat, Ryan Wilson and a 2nd.

Your move, Detroit and San Jose.

A rare photo of Martin Gerber with a puck
in front of him.

12:55 - Mystery solved. Vesa Toskala is going on IR and is done for the year.

Fine. So why exactly was he playing all week?

12:35 - Remember when you saw the first movie in the new Star Wars trilogy? Remember how excited you were, and how you were convinced it would be awesome? Then halfway through you were thinking "Um, this kind of sucks. I really hope this gets better towards the end, or else this whole thing might be a gigantic bust".

I'm kind of getting that vibe right now. You?

(Edit: Further similarities between the Star Wars movie and this trade deadline -- both involve a guy wearing a Darth Vader mask who sucks.)

12:15 - The Leafs have also apparently claimed defenceman Eric Reitz from the Rangers. I have never heard of this player before, so the only thing I can say about him definitely is that he's a better goalie than Martin Gerber.

12:10 - Bruce Garrioch: "Martin Gerber has been absolutely awful in Binghampton. He's been beyond bad... I don't know what the Maple Leafs are thinking. I thought Brian Burke was smarter than this."

12:05 - The Leafs have picked up Martin Gerber on waivers.

I don't even have a joke for this.

11:50 - The Penguins have just acquired Andy Wozniewski. I guess they're making a run for Tavares.

11:30 - TSN is reporting that Olli Jokinen to the Flames is all but done. The holdup may be finding salary cap room. Is this where Burke comes to the rescue to rent Calgary some cap room for a draft pick?

11:25 - From the predictions department: "Dominic Moore is playing so well that I'm going to give him a new nickname: Dominic 'Second Round Pick at the 2009 Deadline' Moore." - That was me, five months ago. Make it happen, Burke.

Too lazy to find a Coyotes photo

11:10 - Re: picks vs prospects.

Chris says: "In general, I would say this isn't a bad policy. However, considering the franchise players to be drafted this year and the fact that Toronto desperately needs new blood, Burke should be more willing to chase some draft picks." But Burke sounds like he doesn't think he can get even a late round first today. Would you still rather have a mid-second pick over a known prospect? Less risk, but less upside.

Tom says: "I disagree with this. If the prospect plays, for example, with Ottawa, then I'd rather have the draft pick." True, although it depends how long he's been there. If you scrub hard enough, you may be able to get the loser stench off.

11:00 - Via Chris Kontos at Cycle Like the Sedins: "Guaranteed, Brian Burke turns this franchise around in a season and half. I saw it with my own eyes across town. I hate you Brian Burke. He will pounce on any other GM who is willing to overpay in the slightest... and then get him to overpay even more."

10:35 - Burke on TSN: "A prospect who's a year away from playing is a better asset than a draft pick." What do you guys think? Agree? Disagree?

10:30 - Pascal Leclaire on being traded to Ottawa: "I've watched their games, and the building is always sold out."

In related news, Pascal Leclaire hasn't watched any Senators games since last year.

10:25 - Breaking news: while I did not win my Roll Up The Rim, I am being strongly encouraged to "please play again". So I must be on the right track.

10:10 - TSN is saying that talks with Moore have broken off, and that he will be traded.

10:00 - And now we have our first deal, with Ottawa sending Antione Vermette to Columbus for goalie Pascal Leclaire and a 2nd. Wonder if that takes the Jackets out of the Antropov running?

9:55 - Scratch Ottawa's Filip Kuba from the trade watch. The Sens have signed him to a 3-year extension at $3.7M/year. This will help fill the critical "be completely unnoticeable but pick up a second assist on a meaningless goal" role for Ottawa. They're apparently also closing in on signing Chris Neil.

James Duthie: "The team has had a horrible year, and now it sounds like there won't be any changes coming".

9:40 - Some talk in the comments about Jason Spezza. Here's my take: the Sens have done everything they could to ruin this kid. Yes, he's lazy. Yes, he hates to backcheck. But he has a ton of skill, and sometimes you just need to let a young kid play. Instead, the Sens wanted him to be a two-way player right away. That's just not how it works for most young players.

If the Sens had hired Pat Quinn (instead of hiring a teenager as coach to protect Bryan Murray's power base), Spezza could have been huge. As it is, I'm not sure he'll ever be as good as he can be on this team.

"You're getting traded today? Dude, me too!"

9:25 - OK, I'm back. I'm ready to dig into my Denny's grand slam takeout. When I was ordering it, I knew it was going to be a terrible mistake that I would regret for a long time, but I couldn't help myself. So I'm already in NHL GM mode.

Pierre McGuire on TSN just said that the Leafs should trade Dominic Moore. Stunning insight there. Meanwhile, the entire panel says that there's no way Burke can get a first rounder for Antropov.

8:00 a.m. - Welcome to the 2009 NHL Trade Deadline liveblog! Or, as it will be know starting at around 11:00, "that thing that somehow seemed like a really good idea on Monday".

Here's how it will work... I'll be updating this post all day long with news, views, rumors and blatant stalling tactics. New updates will go at the top of the post. That means you'll have to reload occasionally to see the latest content. Anyone viewing through the RSS feed should see updates, but you may be a few hours behind. I'll also be making occasional updates at twitter.com/downgoesbrown.

Please jump in to the comments section. I'll be posting and responding to some of the more interesting comments as the day goes on. And if you have trade deadline coverage on your own blog or a site you like, let me know and I'll head over and steal your ideas post a link.

Right now I'm heading out to take Baby Goes Brown to daycare (don't worry, I gave her my ipod touch so she could keep track of the deadline deals). Then it's off to Tim Hortons for a day's supply of coffee, and I should be back in time to really get going around 9:30.

The sales pitch: Why you need to trade for these Leafs

OK, so Brian Burke and I aren't on the best of terms these days. I want to make it up to him.

With the deadline just a week away, Burke is faced with the task of convincing his fellow GMs to trade for various Leaf players. Needless to say, this won't exactly be easy.

Like any good salesman, Burke needs to go into battle with a game plan. So I've put together a list of talking points that he could use to try to sell other GMs on his wares. They're his to use, free of charge. Consider it a peace offering.

According to Google, this is a picture of
Lee Stempniak. No Leaf fan can confirm this.

The player: Lee Stempniak
The sales pitch: Not one of those late-season pickups who will come in and disrupt precious dressing room chemistry by being noticeable in any way.

The player: Jason Blake
The sales pitch: While many have cited the length of his contract as a cause for concern, the actual salary cap implications are hard to predict since the CBA will have expired and been renegotiated three times before his deal finally ends.

The player: Curtis Joseph
The sales pitch: Will immediately begin bolstering the confidence of your offensive players during practice shooting drills.

The player: Tomas Kaberle
The sales pitch: Is so good that some teams have been willing to deal a 23-year-old future 50-goal scorer and a first round pick for him, if you can possibly believe such a thing. Ha ha. Ha. Oh god I hate my life.

The player: Andre Deveaux
The sales pitch: A trade to another team would increase the young enforcer's value by making it possible for him to some day fight Ryan Hollweg, the only player in the entire NHL he is capable of beating

This is a cool photo, except that a defenceman
was winding up at the point when it was taken

The player: Vesa Toskala
The sales pitch: Recent history has shown that every goalie who leaves the Leafs automatically becomes ten times better on their new team. Which, in Toskala's case, would make him a very solid backup down the stretch in the event that your regular backup gets injured.

The player: Nik Antropov
The sales pitch: Inevitable upcoming stint on injured reserve will clear up valuable late season cap space.

The player: Mikhail Grabovski
The sales pitch: Has been described as "fearless", party due to his habit of making risky plays in the open ice but mostly due to his willingness to talk crap about Belarusian mob underlings.

The player: Dominic Moore
The sales pitch: Future free agent can always be resigned before the off-season, which would be a great idea since career fourth-liners who have unexpected career seasons during a contract year almost always go on to maintain that level of success.

The player: Matt Stajan
The sales pitch: Has shown impressive focus; despite playing almost his entire career on embarrassingly awful teams has never complained, become dejected, or acted like he even vaguely cared.

Miscellaneous ex-Avalanche defenceman

The player: Jeff Finger
The sales pitch: Career sixth-defenceman occasionally plays so well that seasoned hockey executives have been known to mistake him for the infinitely better Kurt Sauer.

The player: Alexei Ponikarovsky
The sales pitch: Averaged 20 goals a season from 2005-08, so he'd be reasonably productive as long as your roster is so utterly devoid of talent that you're forced to play him on the first line next to a future hall of famer.

The player: Alex Steen
The sales pitch: Talented young player has shown impressive defensive acumen, occasional offensive flair, and emerging leadership skills. Is also technically now a member of the St. Louis Blues, so we can let him go for a late round draft pick.

The player: Luke Schenn
The sales pitch: Is excellent at defending odd-man rushes. Which will come in handy, since the asking price is your entire roster and a first round pick.

Lie to me

The secret of success is sincerity. Once you can fake that you've got it made. --Jean Giraudoux

Say what you will about Ron Wilson and Brian Burke, but we know one thing: they're honest.

If they like you, they'll say so. If not, they'll say that too. And for the most part, that's been a breath of fresh air for Leaf Nation.

The John Ferguson/Paul Maurice era was marked by a relentlessly cynical optimism. Ferguson always liked the team, no matter how bad they looked on paper. Maurice famously thought they were going to make the playoffs and compete for a Cup. And the players always claimed they were just one bad bounce away from being really good.

Burke and Wilson came in started to tell it like it is. I loved it.

But here's the thing about honesty. It's not always the ...

Crap, wait a second, I just remember my wife reads this blog sometimes, and she won't like what I'm about to say. Um, hold on.

Hi honey! Say, have you seen the highlights from the Puppy Bowl? Weren't those little guys adorable? They were so just so scrappy!

OK, now that she's gone, let me get back to my point.

Here's the thing about honesty: it's not always the best policy. Sometimes, telling the truth just for the sake of it is dumb. And Ron Wilson and Brian Burke have been treading into that territory in recent weeks.

First, a little history. From the very start, Ron Wilson has refused to sugarcoat the quality of the roster. He told us in September that the team wouldn't be very good, and he's been proven right. When guys like Matt Stajan, Jason Blake and Tomas Kaberle weren't playing at the level they needed to, Wilson didn't worry about protecting anyone's feelings. He made each guy accountable, the way a good coach should (and bad coaches don't).

When Brian Burke joined the fold, he kept the honesty flowing. He didn't try to shine up a turd.

All that honesty created an atmosphere of accountability for a team that had been missing it for years. Suddenly, a locker room that had become used to being treated with kid gloves had to deal with a stiff dose of reality. Not everyone responded, but most did. And a willingless to tell the cold hard truth meant that when a player did hear praise, they knew they'd earned it.

As recently as a few weeks ago, Wilson and Burke called out goalie Vesa Toskala for his poor practice habits. Good. Toskala's a veteran and he's paid to play at a high level. If he's not committed to doing so, he should hear about.

But recently, Wilson and Burke have gone too far. And now, they may be hurting the team.

First, there was Burke's bizarre announcement that he wasn't interested in resigning Nik Antropov. While there's no doubt Burke meant what he said, his honesty probably didn't accomplish anything beyond lowering Antropov's trade value.

Next up was Dominic Moore. A few days ago, Wilson said that fans were getting "carried away" with Moore's production, and pointed out that he wouldn't be good enough to have the same sort of offensive numbers on a better team. "Scoring points on a really bad team, that's really all it is," Wilson said.

Was Wilson wrong? Probably not. But why dismiss Moore's accomplishments right before the trade deadline? And beyond that, Moore is a long-time fourth-liner who's about to taste unrestricted free agency after a career year -- what kind of coach publicly cuts a guy down under those circumstances?

Then came today's comments from Burke about rookie goalie Justin Pogge. "He has not earned the right to be here," Burke said, going on to explain that Pogge was getting NHL starts primarily to try to motivate Toskala even though the kid didn't really belong in the big leagues.

Again, brutally honest and probably 100% correct. But Pogge is a borderline prospect having an underwhelming AHL season, forced to audition for an NHL role behind a terrible defensive team. He'd hardly be human if his confidence wasn't already shakey. What possible good can come from hearing his GM cut him down to size on the radio?

For the life of me, I can't figure out what these two are thinking with some of the recent comments. So I'll take a cue from Wilson and Burke and try a little honesty myself: They sound like two guys who have suddenly become a little too interested in the sound of their own voices, and have forgotten that they're here to win.

Winning over the media folks who love a good sound bite doesn't go very far towards building a contending team. But a little bit of well-placed B.S. just might.

Lie to me, guys. Or at least play the part of the good husband, and learn when to change the subject.

Maple Leaf salary fun facts

Here's a couple of loose ends from last week's Mid-Season Value Ranking post. While putting the post together, I did some research into the Leafs' current contract and salary cap commitments. I learned a couple of things that I found interesting.

Fun fact #1: The Leafs highest paid forward is Jason Blake, thanks to his Contract of Eternal Damnation™. Next on the list is recent FA signing Nik Hagman. Do you know which Leaf forward is their third highest paid?

No, not Antropov. No, not Poni. Not even Stempy. Give up? It's this guy.

Fun fact #2: Unlike many teams, the Leafs don't have much in the way of long-term contracts. In fact, as of today the team only has a cap commitment to one player beyond 2012. Can you name him? Answer: this guy.

Oh, and on a completely unrelated note, this.

And the next Leafs captain should be...

"C" no evil

This burning question in the Barilkosphere for the last week or so, other than "is it actually possible to screw up a no-trade scenario any worse than Bryan McCabe did?" has been around the identity of the next Leafs captain. Who should get the honor, assuming Sundin isn't back?

(And don't worry, eyebeleaf -- even I wouldn't suggest we strip Sundin of his 'C' if he re-signs¹.)

The Leafs have recently made a habit of bringing their old captains back to the fold: Wendel twice, and Dougie once. It says here that they should do it again.

They should award this year's captaincy to the same player who had it from 1986-89.

Nobody.

Back then, the Leafs didn't have any especially good candidates for the captain's job. The team wasn't very good, their few decent players were too young to carry a leadership role, and they didn't have much in the way of veteran presence. Stop me if any of this sounds familiar.

Faced with that scenario, and for perhaps the only time during the Ballard years, the Leafs did the right thing. They played without a captain for three years.

They should do it again. The current Leafs roster doesn't have a single player who deserves to wear the "C". And since there's no rule that says you need to have a captain, and no real disadvantage to going without one, the Leafs should declare the captaincy vacant for at least one season.

Let's look at the candidates on the current roster:

An established veteran like Tomas Kaberle, Pavel Kubina or Nik Antropov - Kaberle is a decent option, and would be my choice if I had to choose somebody. He's the longest serving Leaf, he's probably the best player on the team, and he's kept his nose clean. But from all accounts he's not much of a dressing room presence, preferring to stand aside and let others take on leadership duties. Could he grow into a more vocal leadership role? Sure. And if he does, he should be the next captain -- sometime in the next few years.

Kubina has been linked to the captaincy this week, and Antropov has been mentioned in various spots. But Antropov has essentially had one good season as a Leaf, and Kubina has arguably had one good month. And either one could become trade bait at this year's deadline, if not sooner. A captain should be somebody a team is committed to in the long term. I'm not sure either of these guys are in that category.

Besides, it's been well-established that the Leafs dressing room became a country club over the past few years. Players weren't held accountable, the same lazy errors happened over and over again, and nobody ever seemed all that bothered by any of it. Do any of the veterans who were part of last year's leadership core really deserve another shot so soon after that disaster?

A veteran newcomer like Jamal Mayers. No way. You don't hand your captaincy over to a new guy unless they're among the great leaders in the game. And with apologies to Mayers, who seems like a solid guy on and off the ice, he's not exactly Mark Messier.

One of the kids, like Alex Steen or Matt Stajan - There's certainly plenty of precedent for handing a captaincy over to a youngster. But that's an honor typically reserved for franchise players like Yzerman or Crosby who the team is looking to build around for the next decade. There's nobody on the Leafs roster who even comes close to that level of talent or potential.

Stajan and Steen may have some leadership skills, and either could be a captain in the league someday. But again, why rush it, especially in a pressure-packed market like Toronto? After all, the last time the Leafs let an untested youngster take over an important role, it didn't work out so well.

All of the above: rotate the captaincy - This idea seems to be picking up steam lately, including being raised as a possibility by Fletcher. It may be the worst option of all.

I don't want to get all traditional on you, but we're talking about the Toronto Maple Leafs here, not the Minnesota Wild. The captaincy of an Original Six team, even one wallowing in last place, should mean something. The Leafs have had six captains in the past 30 years. Do they really want to add six more in one season?

So leave the "C" on the sidelines for 2008-09. Use four alternate captains. See who steps up to fill the leadership void, and what kind of impact they can have. If somebody emerges as the team's undisputed leader, then and only then do you hand them the captaincy.

If it happens in time for next season, great. If not, better to go without for a few years than to force the role onto somebody who doesn't deserve it.

¹But if he has three bad games in a row, ship him to the Marlies.

20 Good Things About the 2007-08 Leafs

Optimism Week continues at Down Goes Brown. My first post this week was kind of a copout, since I spent most of it talking about other teams. Baby steps, people.

But today, we're going all out. For this post, I will choose 20 members of the Leafs organization and say something nice about them.

Can I do it? Is it possible that 20 good things happened in this writeoff of a season? Let's find out.

Wait, why is the goalie wearing blue too?

Bryan McCabe - Offensive contribution was actually greater than stats would indicate, thanks to obscure NHL bylaw that only gives credit for goals scored into opponent's net.

Andrew Raycroft - Much like Martin Brodeur (chip shot off glass) and Rick DiPietro (quick outlet pass from behind net), has developed his own trademark play for clearing the zone: "faceoff at center ice".

Kyle Wellwood - Knows that despite advances in theoretical physics, scientists still can't explain exactly how gravity functions or rule out the slim possibility that it could unexpectedly cease to work in the future. So just in case, bravely dedicated his summer to making sure his couch didn't float away.

Mark Bell - Crushed every Sens fan's will to live by injuring Mike Fisher, destroying Daniel Alfredsson, and then somehow sneaking onto the ScotiaBank Place ice before a playoff game dressed as a fat guy in a gladiator helmet.

Anton Stralman - Certainly cleared up any lingering confusion over that whole "the next Niklas Lidstrom" thing.

Nik Antropov - Was arguably the only Leaf to exceed expectations this year, scoring just enough big goals to singlehandedly keep the team from getting a top draft pick.

It's getting closer, closer... hey, what does that horn mean?

Vesa Toskala - Constantly finding new and creative ways to challenge himself, such as resolving to stop all 180-foot slapshots using only sense of smell.

Jason Blake - Revolutionized youth hockey coaching by dedicating entire season to single-handedly disproving the old "It's never a bad play to shoot the puck" theory.

Carlo Colaiacovo - Successfully read this sentence without hurting himself.

Andy Wozniewski - Showed impressive courage and determination by repeatedly suiting up for NHL games despite being really, really horrible at playing hockey.

Jeremy Williams - Showed tremendous respect for the head coach who gave him two minutes of ice time a night, eventually realizing he was embarassing him by scoring every single game and cutting that out.

Cliff Fletcher - Is proactively working to improve the team the best way he knows how -- by repeatedly calling up Minnesota GM Doug Riseborough and asking him if he feels like trading his best players for a five-pack of crap.

Darcy Tucker - Fulfilled obligations as corporate spokesperson by always remembering to wear his "Kewl" brand hat during post-game interviews, or would have, had he ever done anything that would warrant a post-game interview.

Alex Steen - His play served as a soothing reminder for Leafs fans that all those first rounders JFJ traded away wouldn't necessarily have ended up being very good anyways.

Justin Pogge - Currently with the Marlies gaining extensive experience in not taking part in the playoffs, which will be invaluable once he graduates to the Leafs roster.

Pavel Kubina - Played about 20 minutes a game, scored a handful of big goals, and wasn't bad defensively. And hey, that's about all you can ask from a $5 million defenceman, right?

Ian White - Not one of those obnoxious spotlight-seeking pro atheletes who tries to hog media attention by ever actually doing anything noteworthy.

"What the hell, go ahead and take most of October and November off too."

Paul Maurice - Is a totally cool boss who lets his employees leave two months early every year.

Tomas Kaberle - Four-for-four performance in accuracy shooting during NHL Skills competition answered the age old question "Is Tomas Kaberle physically capable of actually shooting the god-damned puck?"

Mats Sundin - Sent a powerful message about loyalty, leadership, and finishing what you start, which will no doubt prove exceedingly inspirational for his new teammates once he signs with Detroit this summer.

What would it cost the Leafs to trade up to #1?

According to the Toronto Sun, Cliff Fletcher recently raised the idea of trading up at the draft, including the possibility of moving all the way up to #1.

Great idea. But what would it cost?

Impossible to know for sure, of course. For one, there’s nothing to suggest the Lightning will even make the pick available. If a bidding war developed, who knows where the final price could wind up.

But just for fun, let's see if we come up with an educated guess. If the Leafs wanted to trade up to #1 overall, what kind of offer would it take to get in the door?

NFL fans will recognize this chart, which outlines the approximate values for draft picks in a given year. (If you already know what the NFL Trade Chart is and want to skip to the part about how the Leafs and Stamkos, click here.)

The values start at 3,000 for the top pick and declines for each subsequent picks. The drop from the first pick to the second is steep, the drop from second to third slightly less so, and so on until later rounds when the point values decline slowly.

This makes sense -- the difference between one or two picks is enormous at the top of a draft, gets less important as the draft moves on, and all but washes out by the end. Math fans will recognize the points distribution as resembling (although not directly based on) a power law graph.

The chart is an approximation -- it isn't specific to any particular year or draft. It goes without saying that the value of a pick, especially one at the top of the first round, will fluctuate year-to-year depending on who is available. The #1 overall pick in Sidney Crosby's draft year was worth a lot more than in Patrick Stefan's. But “The Chart” as its known in NFL draft circles, often ends up being surprisingly accurate. More than a few recent NFL draft day trades have been made that matched perfectly based on chart value.

And while The Chart was designed for the NFL, it can be applied to other sports as well, at least as a starting point. Keep in mind that both the NFL and NHL have seven round drafts and a similar number of teams (32 vs 30), so the values will fit relatively well.

So what does The Chart say it would cost the Leafs to move up? Let's take a look.

The #1 overall pick is assigned a value of 3,000 points. The Leafs hold the seventh pick, which is valued at 1,500. So we'll start our offer there, and we're already halfway home.

Now it gets tricky. The Leafs don't own their second round pick this year -- it went to Phoenix is the Yanic Perrault trade. I'll pause here so you can curse JFJ and punch yourself in the temple a few times.

They do own the Penguins second rounder, thanks to Fletcher's Hal Gill trade. That would be the #57 pick if the draft was held today, although it could shift depending on who wins the Cup. For sake of argument let's call it #57, which gives it a value of 330 points.

So far our offer includes our top two picks, and we're not even close to fair value -- just 1,830 total, well short of the 3,000 we need. The Leafs third round pick will only carry a value in the 230 range, so clearly we're not going to get far by adding more picks. In fact, the Leafs could package every pick they own and it still wouldn't get them to fair value according to The Chart.

What about trading a pick from future seasons? That's a possibility. But keep in mind that the rule-of-thumb for draft picks is that a pick loses one round of value for each year in the future you go. That means that a 2009 second rounder would only be worth the equivalent of a 2008 third rounder. We're getting into diminishing returns here.

The bottom line is that if we want to make this deal happen, we're going to need to go out and get more picks.

So let's try that. If the Leafs could acquire a mid- to late-round pick in the first, their chances start to look better. For sake of argument, let's target the #22 pick (currently held by the Rangers, but again subject to change).

Who could the Leafs deal for a pick in that range? Tough call. Bryan McCabe and Darcy Tucker sure aren't getting it done. Pavel Kubina might have at the trade deadline, but probably not now. On the other hand, Alex Steen might fetch a late first rounder, and Nik Antropov would be a good candidate as well assuming his knee is OK.

Let's pull the trigger for that #22 pick, which The Chart values at 780 points. That brings us to 2,610 points. We're just 390 points short of fair value now.

That's the equivalent of a mid-second rounder, which the Leafs don't have. So you're looking at moving another player off the roster. As a ballpark, players on the current roster who could fetch a second rounder would probably includes guys like Ponikoravsky, or maybe Ian White.

So based on The Chart and our imaginary wheeling and dealing, here's what that trade for the #1 overall pick would look like.

To Toronto: #1 overall pick
To Tampa Bay: #7 overall, #22 overall (at a cost of Alex Steen or Nik Antropov), the #51 pick (cost: Ian White or Alex Ponikoravsky), and Pittsburgh's #57 pick

Of course, there would be other ways to make a deal work. Tomas Kaberle has plenty of trade value, for example -- find a way to work him in and you're going to make your job easier. There's also the possibility of players coming back to Toronto in a deal, additional teams becoming involved, etc.

But at least we have a starting point. Two first rounders, and two seconds. That's two good young players off the roster, and no picks in between #1 and the early third round. And my gut tells me that this offer, while in the ballpark, wouldn't be enough to close a deal.

What do you think? Too much to give up? Not enough? Would you make the deal?