Tuesday, February 15, 2011

A brief history of hockey brawls

This camera must have had
a hell of a shutter speed.
Seen any good fights lately?

Probably. In recent weeks we've watched Brent Johnson knockout fellow goaltender Rick DiPietro with a single punch. Boston and Dallas started a game with three separate fights in four seconds. Then the Bruins and Canadiens brawled, including another goalie scrap. And then the biggest explosion of all, at least so far, as the Islanders and Penguins rematch resulted in 346 penalty minutes, 23 games worth of suspensions, several injuries and a fine to the Islanders' organization.

So let the hand-wringing begin. But the league and its fans has been down this road before. And in fact, this latest round of incidents is only the latest in a long history of fights, brawls and general mayhem.

So join me in a nostalgic look back at some other well-known hockey brawls. You know, or else I'll punch you in the head.

March 5, 2004 - The Senators and Flyers combine for a league record 419 PIM after a series of fights are touched off by an argument over which franchise will destroy the careers of the most goaltenders during the rest of the decade.

October 2, 2008 - After the fifth different altercation to feature a player viciously attacking Sean Avery, the Dallas Stars coaching staff decides to just cancel rest of the practice and try again tomorrow.

April 20, 1984 - The Canadiens and Nordiques combine for over 250 penalty minutes and 10 ejections in a game that comes to be known as "la bataille du Vendredi saint" or, in English, "pretty standard for a game between Quebec and Montreal".

March 4, 2003 - An enraged Darcy Tucker dives into the Ottawa bench and remains there for several seconds, inadvertently becoming the third longest serving coach in Senators' history.

1982 to 1993, inclusive - In an extended incident that most hockey historians will later describe as "maybe a bit excessive", every single player in the Norris Division is involved in a spirited fight with every single other player at all times for twelve straight years, with the exception of Steve Yzerman.

March 15, 2006 - Chris Pronger is ejected from the game after a rampage that leaves seven players facing career-threatening injuries, which is unfortunate since it was a spring-training game between the Baltimore Orioles and Kansas City Royals.

October 4, 2007 - A rare goalie fight during an intrasquad scrimmage leaves Andrew Raycroft and Vesa Toskala facing significant injuries and lengthy suspensions, every Leaf fan really wishes in hindsight.

February 18, 1992 - Towards the end of a wild bench-clearing brawl involving such enforcers as Rob Ray, Brad May, Gord Donnelly, Jay Wells and Brad Miller, the Buffalo Sabres sheepishly begin to realize that the Hartford Whalers left two hours ago and they've all just been fighting each other.

December 23, 1979 - Mike Milbury climbs into the stands and beats a fan with his own shoe, in what everyone now agrees is probably the fifteenth or sixteenth dumbest thing he's ever done.

January 4, 1987 - Canada and Russia are disqualified from the World Junior tournament after a massive brawl that will be unanimously criticized by the media as "outrageous" and "shameful" and "totally going to screw up the 'you never see any brawls in international hockey' argument we make in all our anti-fighting columns".

May 11, 1989 - After an increasingly out-of-control Ron Hextall viciously attacks Chris Chelios in the dying moments of the Wales Conference Finals, concerned government authorities finally agree to green-light the top secret cyborg assassin program that will eventually lead to the creation of Felix Potvin.

November 7, 1998 - Red Wings and Avalanche players immediately engage in five separate and bloody fights as soon as the puck hits the ice, which really scares the crap out of the disabled child doing the ceremonial puck drop.




18 comments:

  1. "March 15, 2006 - Chris Pronger is ejected from the game after a rampage that leaves seven players facing career-threatening injuries, which is unfortunate since it was a spring-training game between the Baltimore Orioles and Kansas City Royals."

    "November 7, 1998 - Red Wings and Avalanche players immediately engage in five separate and bloody fights as soon as the puck hits the ice, which really scares the crap out of the disabled child doing the ceremonial puck drop."

    Laughed so hard at these two.

    ReplyDelete
  2. "March 5, 2004 - The Senators and Flyers combine for a league record 419 PIM after a series of fights are touched off by an argument over which franchise will destroy the careers of the most goaltenders during the rest of the decade."

    I'm pretty sure we (Philly) won that argument.

    ReplyDelete
  3. "October 4, 2007 - A rare goalie fight during an intrasquad scrimmage leaves Andrew Raycroft and Vesa Toskala facing significant injuries and lengthy suspensions, every Leaf fan really wishes in hindsight."

    I became an atheist because God never responded to my prayers for this.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wait. The Royals' spring training complex is in Arizona, and Baltimore's spring training complex is in Florida. Is this satire or something?

    The Tucker joke was amazing. I guarantee even Daniel Alfredsson would laugh at that one.

    ReplyDelete
  5. "Wait. The Royals' spring training complex is in Arizona, and Baltimore's spring training complex is in Florida. Is this satire or something?"

    Well played, sir. Well played.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Love, LOVE the Tucker joke,

    Can't wait for Friday!

    ReplyDelete
  7. This must be on the Top5 for sure!
    Very funny and I think I understod most of it too.
    Yey me!

    ReplyDelete
  8. This deserved 5 stars just for the Ron Hextall/Felix Potvin reference! Great stuff, DGB!

    ReplyDelete
  9. felix potvin project..AWESOME..go flyers..and thanks for versteeg chummmmmmmps

    ReplyDelete
  10. seems to me there was a famous brawl in the early seventies during which Jacques Plante's mask was thrown into the stands. also, i can recall a photo on the cover of the wpg free press or wpg tribune of bobby hull's toupee being thown into the stands during a wha brawl. good times...

    ReplyDelete
  11. Vesa Toskala spotted! :D

    ReplyDelete
  12. lol, love it. I will be posting a defence of hockey fights on my blog this weekend. in the meantime, I just posted a article on Phil Kessel, and why is is not that bad.


    Phi Kessel is not so bad....
    http://the-devilsadvocate.blogspot.com/2011/02/phil-kessel-my-hero.html

    ReplyDelete
  13. actually, I enjoyed watching Hextall go nuclear on Chelios. The elbow he threw on Brian Propp earlier in the series went unpenalized; today the same hit would have the league office fainting like a Victorian lady. If you buy into the "players policing themselves" argument, you're disappointed he didn't do it sooner and really get in a good shot on Chelly.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I'm surprised nary a mention of Emery vs. the entire Buffalo Sabres lineup.   I just watched that one the other day for the sheer joyous memory of it.  That gigantic grin of his as he pounded faces resonates with me.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Film at eleven,...... LOL

    ReplyDelete
  16. "October 4, 2007 - A rare goalie fight during an intrasquad scrimmage leaves Andrew Raycroft and Vesa Toskala"... Which left both with nagging injuries to their brains and glove hands that ruined their potential as goaltenders.


    Mystery solved.

    ReplyDelete
  17. That Habs Nordiques battle is one of my favourite hockey memories. Claude Lemieux started a bench clearing brawl at the end of one period. Took the refs about a half hour, to pull everyone apart, sort out the penalties and clean the debris off the ice so that the Zamboni could come out. Lemieux was ejected but then he came out to skate warm-ups with the team - before the refs had returned - and it was deja vu all over again. I think it turned out to be close to a ninety minute intermission, all told.

    Couldn't tell you anything that actually happened when the clock was running but I don't mind being a neanderthal.

    ReplyDelete