Thursday, April 1, 2010

April Fools - NHL style

It's April 1, and here at Down Goes Brown that means two things: the Leafs have been mathematically eliminated from the playoffs, and it's time for the annual April Fools post.

So just like in 2008 and 2009, let's see if we can come up with some practical jokes and wacky pranks that various NHL personalities could play on each other today.

Uh, we're over here, Marc.Marc Savard - Playfully tease Matt Cooke when he asks if you've forgiven him by blinking twice for "no" instead of once for "yes".

Taylor Hall - Call Brian Burke; tell him you just checked the standings and are wondering why no Leafs scouts ever come to your games.

Phoenix Coyotes - Send out season ticket renewal forms with a Winnipeg return address.

Alexander Ovechkin - Scare Ted Leonsis by telling him that you were a regular client of that steroid-dealing chiropractor. Quickly reassure him that in truth you've never even seen a chiropractor, since you've never suffered from any back problems at all unless you want to count all that acne.

2K Sports - Pick some random second-liner from an insignificant team; tell him he's been chosen for the cover of NHL 2K11.

Mr. BeanStephane Auger - Before tonight's game, inform one of the players that you're planning to "get him", when in fact you're really planning to get a completely different player.

Gary Bettman - Make a hilarious announcement that blindside hits will now result in suspensions but not penalties, as if any self-respecting league would ever do such a thing.

Joe Thornton - Completely forget how to be an effective hockey player. (Not actually a prank; more of an annual April tradition.)

Pat Quinn - Tell team that it's really important to give their best effort during their remaining games because they still matter somehow.

Mario Lemieux - Over breakfast, jokingly suggest to Sidney Crosby that maybe it's time for him to move out and get his own place like an actual man would do.

Noses are hard.Jonathan Toews - Confuse Blackhawk fans by posing for a massive highway billboard next to a strange trophy none of them have ever seen before.

Florida Panthers - During boring team meeting, throw paper airplane at David Booth that hits him right in the head! Ha, he never even saw -- oh god, I think we killed him.

Shane O'Brien - When the bartender asks if you want to buy another round, humorously reply "No thank you, because I am a professional athlete and I have practice tomorrow".




22 comments:

  1. change the hyperlink to the 09 april fools to "/2009/04"

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  2. -- Ohh God, I think we killed him


    HahahhHAhahhA Gold

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  3. lol, oh man they were all classic. Top shelf, good sir :)

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  4. Mike Richards/Jaroslav SpacekApril 1, 2010 at 10:25 AM

    Loved the Booth one. Pure comedy gold. Keep this up DGB!

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  5. Unquestionable awesomeness is what this is. Always a viable alternative to paying attention in class.

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  6. "2K Sports - Pick some random second-liner from an insignificant team; tell him he's been chosen for the cover of NHL 2K11."

    That was gold

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  7. Money! A great post as always! Especially loved the Mario and Auger lines....

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  8. AznBlackhawksFanApril 1, 2010 at 1:37 PM

    I love the Toews one! So true. And I thank you for not poking fun at the snoutish nose of his depicted in the mural.

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  9. Good stuff, sir! Good stuff all around

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  10. Maple Leafs: Announce that the leafs will ice an actual NHL team in 2010-11

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  11. Oh yeah, Kesler is really a random second liner...roughly 70 points, one of the best 2 way players in the game, one of the best faceoff guys in the game, and twice as good as anyone on the Leafs....and getting better every year. Oh but hes not Canadian so he must not be good...

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  12. I like the Mario one though. I cannot believe Crosby has not moved into his own place yet.

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  13. awesome post!

    Patrick Kane - hail a cab but then tell driver to "keep the change" at the end of the trip.

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  14. Uh oh, Anonymous Canucks fan is pissy! Too bad no one cares. Well done DGB, as always.

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  15. Toskala's agent should tell him a team other than the Flyers wants him next year.

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  16. Ice Edge - Tell Dave Shoalts that you're dropping your bid to buy the Coyotes and instead pitching into a bid to buy Manchester United...wait...

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  17. Bettman should call Balsille and say, find you can buy the Coyotes.

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  18. OMG, LOL
    http://www.nationallacrosseleagueblog.blogspot.com/

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  19. detroit red wings- reveal elaborate plan to tank first 3 quarters of the season and then mke the fifth eed, destroy your opponents and make espn hockey writers look stupid

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  20. The Philadelphia Flyers: Announce that all goaltenders are healthy for the stretch run

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  21. I'm a Canucks fan and I still thought the Kesler one was hilarious.

    And the Shane O'Brien one.

    But most of all, the Booth one.

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  22. Laugh all you want, but you will learn to FEAR THE TOEWSBEARPIG!!!

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