Wednesday, November 24, 2010

Gary Bettman's flowchart for dealing with NHL scandals

The NHL is coming off yet another tough week on the PR front. The Colin Campbell email controversy continues to rage, despite the league's best efforts to assure everyone that it's no big deal.

Of course, the Campbell story is only the latest in a growing list of controversies that Gary Bettman's administration has had to deal with recently. We saw the messy accusations of bias against referee Stephane Auger earlier this year. The Phoenix Coyotes saga continues to drag on with no end in sight. And let's not even get into the seemingly endless parade of owners who find themselves embroiled in various financial conflicts.

But to his credit, Bettman doesn't let those close to him off the hook. Just like players and coaches, league officials are held to high standards and can face serious repercussions for stepping out of line. The league has a strict policy in place for ensuring accountability and they follow it to the letter. Last week's Campbell situation was only the latest example.

Here, thanks to my spies at the NHL head office, is the league's official document for handling high-level scandals and controversies.




25 comments:

  1. Favorite part is that it all points to doing nothing.

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  2. Without even reading it, the "do nothing" makes it 5.

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  3. haha, awesome stuff. "IGNORE HARDER" had me laughing.

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  4. Haha. "Ignore harder!"

    Now to trace the Kovalchuk contract through the thing and ... oh. Yup! Nothing doing!

    Gary Bettman creeps me out.

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  5. Awesome.

    love these flow charts.

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  6. the coyotes debacle:

    is it an example of work harder and not profiting

    or hire lawyers, implement bad planning, and ??? profit?

    or is it really the typical nhl example of DO NOTHING. it's a disease. it almost remindes me of the blue and white disease.

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  7. I like the part where it leads to "Do nothing".

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  8. meh, not as good as the Suspension flowchart!!!

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  9. this chart could have used a damnit Colie!

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  10. I can't decide what was better, this flow chart or the suspension (regular season or playoff) flow chart from a while back.

    You could have attached the flow chart to the box "Player".

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  11. I love how this is actually fairly accurate... Greater accountability is needed for sure.

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  12. I was sure you would have something about asking a GM to fire his coach to change the subject

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  13. Along with the image of someone straining to ignore a scandal (or anything, for that matter), I was greatly amused by the idea of repeatedly asking someone if they think they did something wrong until they doubt themselves. I wonder if I could win an argument that way...

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  14. I'm kinda disappointed that there was no "wear an ugly sweater" option on the flowchart

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  15. As a journalist, the condescending section was my favourite. Bettman's a troll.

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  16. Brilliant as always DBG. Love the "how condescending was he?" part.

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  17. I think an Honoured Convicted Felons wing in the Hockey Hall Of Fame is long overdue.

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  18. Only thing missing is the 2-4 week timeline it takes to get it all done.

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  19. Prepare to be "Farked"

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  20. Now, THAT'S FUNNY!

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  21. Hilarious! But...you need section about arguing with Ron McLean (I.E. ownership issue, get on HNIC and argue..)

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  22. Where is the section for Bettman doing something wrong? It should go straight to do nothing.

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  23. hmm, this looks mysteriously similar to the Suspensions flow chart way back...

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