There’s been a recent trend on The Athletic’s hockey pages in which writers take a look back at their preseason predictions to see how they did. There’s value in that – anyone can make predictions, but you have to face the music on what you got wrong if you’re going to enjoy a victory lap or two on the ones you got right.
I want in. But there’s a problem: My preseason predictions are a little bit … different. I’ve made an annual habit of making oddly specific predictions for each team, ones that involve an exact number or a precise game or somebody doing something in a very convoluted way.
Why do it that way? I’ve asked myself that question more than once, but think of it this way: Everyone else’s predictions are them trying to sink free throws and three-pointers while I’m the guy doing behind-the-back trick shots. From half court. Sometimes blindfolded. I’m going to miss pretty much every time, but if I ever sink one then I’ll make sure you never hear the end of it.
And every now and then, I do manage to hit one. Last season, I mapped out the Blue Jackets’ entire midseason roster plan before it happened. A few years before that, I had the Canadiens firing their coach midway through the season but still making the playoffs. Swish.
But most of the time, I’m lucky if I can get near the backboard. More often, there are airballs. Occasionally I break a window. Have I sufficiently beaten this metaphor into the ground? I think I have, let’s move on.
So how did I do this year? Let’s all take a moment to lower our expectations and then go through the list of this season’s predictions to find out.
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