Wednesday, May 29, 2013

At the combine: A look at the top prospects for the 2013 NHL draft


In hindsight, the photographer picked a weird
time to ask Drouin and MacKinnon where they
thought Seth Jones would get picked

The NHL scouting combine is being held this week in Toronto, which makes this as good a time as any to have a look at the top prospects for next month's draft.

Well, technically a better time would be right before the draft. But thanks to the lockout, there appears to be a good chance that this year's draft will be start 15 minutes after the conclusion of the Stanley Cup finals, so we might as well go ahead and do the preview now.

Here are sixteen top prospects who can expect to hear their names called at the 2013 entry draft in New Jersey.

Seth Jones - This big strong defenceman would be a perfect fit in Colorado thanks to his ability to protect goaltenders from traffic in the crease and forwards driving the net and crazy coaches who keep trying to fight them.

Nathan MacKinnon - Scouts in Florida say he's exactly the kind of player who could really bring Panthers fans out of their seats, so based on recent attendance figures he's apparently already been playing there for a few years.

Jonathan Drouin - Oh sure, he racked up the points in Halifax playing on a line with MacKinnon, but let's see what he can do when he's stuck in Tampa Bay playing with Steven Stamkos and wait actually he'll probably be pretty good at that too.

Nikita Zadorov - The 6'5" 230 pound teen did very well on the Wingate cycling test, assuming that the bicycle immediately exploding is considered a good thing.

Max Domi - Is well-known for having grown up with famous NHL bloodlines, in the sense that every time his dad came home from work he'd leave a trail of the blood of famous players all over the house.

Valeri Nichushkin - The potential Predator draft pick is said to be excited by how knowledgeable Nashville fans are about his KHL experience, since everyone he meets down there immediately starts talking about the virtues of Traktor ownership.

Anthony Mantha - Would have been eligible for last year's draft if he had been born one day earlier, so since he's already good at missing deadlines let's just pencil him in as the next prospective owner of the Coyotes.

Darnell Nurse - Scouts agree that he'll have to adjust to the increased challenges of playing at the next level, such as opposing players making hilarious jokes about his last name that he's no doubt never heard before.

Sasha Barkov - Is considered a strong north-south player who can also play an east-west style of game, although some scouts suggest he'd be even better if he kept his head up instead of constantly consulting his pocket compass.

Andre Burakowsky - Has developed a reputation as a selfish player who won't pass the puck to skilled teammates, so he'd probably be a good fit on a team like Buffalo where he wouldn't have any.

Bo Horvat - Is known as a player who can hurt you in many ways. For example, if you go up to him and laughingly say "Bo knows hockey!" he'll just stare at you before explaining that that commercial came out six years before he was born, at which point you will need to sit down in your rocking chair and cry.

Michael McCarron - Was every bit as good as Nathan MacKinnon according to some of the modern-day advanced statistics, although come to think of it nobody's really sure why we have a "capital letters per name" stat in the first place.

Sean Monahan - Has spent the last year running his own blog, so at this point he's probably just figured out how to aggregate the hard work that all the other players do and get all the credit for it.

Rasmus Ristolainen - Is considered an above-average skater, which will be a big deal to the 10 or 12 teams left in the NHL who still play their home games on something resembling ice.

Elias Lindholm - Since the draft is being held in New Jersey, will probably get a big hand from Devils fans looking for one last chance to feel good about an Elias before the next week when Patrik signs with the Rangers in free agency.

Kirby Rychel - Yes he is the son of a former NHL player, but it's ex-Kings enforcer Warren and not whoever this Robert guy is, he tries to yell over his shoulder as he runs from all those Maple Leaf fans pelting him with garbage.




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4 comments:

  1. Lol at the Rychel joke, but don't forget Warren also played for the Leafs for a few unmemorable games as well!

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  2. Kerby Rychel, not Kirby. One's a round pink thing and one's a dude with a squishy-faced cat who also plays hockey I guess. (I like his cat.)

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    Replies
    1. i swear his cat is the diabeetus guy in cat form

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  3. The Max Domi "bloodlines" bit MURDERED me. Haha.

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