Stern felt somehow different moments
after shaking hands with Shea Weber.
How nervous? My sources at the NHL's main office tell me that the switchboard is lighting up with calls from NBA fans who are thinking of jumping ship, at least temporarily. The volume of inquiries is so high that the league has had to create an application form for potential new fans. My spies were able to obtain a copy.
Greetings (soon-to-be former) NBA fans.
It's come to our attention that your league is currently undergoing a work stoppage. And while there has been some encouraging progress in negotiations this week, it's probably best that you don't get your hopes up. These things can tend to drag on. Like for a completely unreasonable amount of time. Um, so we've heard.
Anyways, it's probably a good idea to keep your options open, and to consider becoming an NHL fan. However, before you can become officially certified as a hockey diehard, there is the small matter of some paperwork. Please fill out the form below, and we'll contact you with our decision.
Your last name with "sie" added to the end of it so that we have a creative hockey nickname ready to go for you: